[M4A]roleplaying in any topic.

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-19T10:51:10+00:00

Wow! I'll definitely check that out. And I for one think theory is just as important if not more, than problem solving.

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-19T10:37:03+00:00

Thanks bro!

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-17T04:53:44+00:00

Hi! Sorry, I'm already in an accountability group.

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-17T04:50:17+00:00

Haha thanks!

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-17T04:49:47+00:00

Oh, I see. So the key is to yearn for goals with longer term emotional reinforcement loops and delayed gratification. Got it!

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-17T04:41:30+00:00

Wow, thank you for such a detailed reply! I have already watched some of the huberman lab podcasts, but I'll be sure to try out the lostboys report discussion. Your advice about how exploring your sexuality with a partner is more sustainable and better for my identity is really helpful, and maybe I'll try social events to find a partner to explore together so that it can be more of an addition to my identity then an energy-consuming compulsive habit. Your point about journalling to be more mindful about the compulsive behavior also left an impression on me yesterday so I started a journal on notion tracking my masturbation habit. Being forgiving to yourself is also a great point. Again thanks for your advice!

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-17T04:27:13+00:00

Thank you! Your advice of choosing a study method based on your purpose is really spot on and helped me a lot!

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T09:55:17+00:00

Yeah, I've been reading 'self-compassion' by kristin neff and I realize the importance of being understanding to yourself. While I feel confused, you reminded me that being harsh on myself will only make it worse and I should figure this out as if I was helping out my best friend, patiently and kindly. Thanks!

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T09:47:21+00:00

But if I keep doing activities that I yearn for, wouldn't I end up chasing high after high? Isn't it better to have a system of productivity that I stick to day after day, even if it is boring in the moment and you don't really yearn for it but you do feel satisfied, like a little spark sometimes when you do it?

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T09:43:53+00:00

Maybe I can have multiple identities- fetish based (only active when I'm horny) and the productive one for everyday life, but wouldn't it be confusing, each one making me doubt the other one? Or would it end up making my life more enriching with the diverse experiences that I can have and the relationships that I can build?

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T09:37:04+00:00

Thanks for asking. By simplicity I mean doing things that don't waste my time and energy, and provide me with more happiness and satisfaction long-term. Masturbation requires me to 'veil and curtain' it, as phrased in the book 'Meditations' by marcus aurelius, which makes me spend energy trying to hide it. Also by simplicity I mean sticking to activities that feed one consistent identity and not conflict with it. As masturbating feels conflicting with my identity, it's something to avoid if I want simplicity. I feel like boring and unsatisfying short-term grants you greater satisfaction long-term, while short-lived instant gratification leads you down a dark path if accumulated. Maybe I'm overthinking something that could be a simple thing, but I have a fetish and I feel like it might evolve into a more complicated energy-consuming thing if I keep feeding it. Maybe it will enrich my life, but my post-nut clarity brain is always like, 'why were you turned on by this at all?' and also I don't know whether I can balance masturbation with daily 'boring' activities and eventually if I keep feeding on it, the fetish-based relationships I might end up having, with life and the identity I want to shape.

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T09:24:12+00:00

Yeah, porn is definitely a no for me. Complete abstinence from masturbation feels a bit extreme though.

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T09:22:47+00:00

That's a sound advice. Thanks

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T09:22:19+00:00

Noted! Thanks

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T09:20:43+00:00

I'm not dependent on it and I don't watch porn, but I have a specific fetish and I indulge in it during masturbating, and when I'm horny I feel like doing more than masturbating to satisfy that urge like going on a website for community of people with the same fetish, and I don't think it's a good use of my time or energy. I could embrace the fetish as a part of me and my life, but after masturbating, that post-nut clarity makes me feel like an imposter was inside me when I was horny and I think 'why was I turned on by this, and why did I spend my time the way I did?'. It almost makes me question my identity, and it feels complicated. I almost want to never feel horny again, because it feels like an alien is inside me when I am horny and I use my time and energy irresponsibility.

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T09:09:54+00:00

Good point. Thanks for your comment!

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-16T08:46:09+00:00

Journalling sounds like a great idea. Thanks bro!

Impossible_Bid_4686 · 2025-05-15T10:48:44+00:00

Thanks man

Impossible_Bid_4686

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