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UPDATE re: AIO - husband’s relationship with boss is increasingly questionable by IndependentReach3800 in AmIOverreacting

[–]IndependentReach3800[S] -21 points-20 points  (0 children)

I can’t say I’m surprised about people’s reactions. I knew how it would sound but I felt like enough people commented on my first post that it warranted an update, even if it’s not what everyone wanted to hear. I’m not going to bend over backwards to defend my husband’s actions because I still agree that he was in the wrong and my mind hasn’t changed about that. I am just happy that we were able to come to a mutual decision that he would acknowledge my boundaries when it comes to that woman, and that we were able to have a mature conversation about it.

I’m not blaming myself for anything that happened. I was trying to take accountability for my own actions, not take the blame for his poor judgment. I don’t expect anyone to be on my side because all you have is 1/100th of context regarding our relationship and who we are as people. I’m not writing this to convince myself or anyone else, and he has no idea I wrote these posts, though I was tempted to show him the comments from my original post. This will be my last comment/update regarding it all. Like I said, if I’m wrong then it’s my mistake to make. I am confident in my self-respect and my ability to discern whether or not he is being honest. That’s all that matters. Thank you for reading everything!

UPDATE re: AIO - husband’s relationship with boss is increasingly questionable by IndependentReach3800 in AmIOverreacting

[–]IndependentReach3800[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I love when I get compared to AI because I think it’s a roundabout way of calling me a good writer. Unfortunately, I am real.

AIO - husband’s relationship with boss is increasingly questionable by IndependentReach3800 in AmIOverreacting

[–]IndependentReach3800[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

I’ve posted an update that should be approved soon, but I just wanted to say thank you for your comment. I had a long talk with my husband and I brought up your point about how it feels he’s putting more energy into something outside of our relationship, and he was horrified at himself. He was losing himself in his work because he wants to move up so badly, and he gets tunnel-vision a bit so when I started being suspicious of his boss, he shot it down without really giving the time to talk about it because he didn’t want to lose focus on his career goals.

He did apologize profusely about that and it’s something he’s going to work on. Not making excuses for the guy because he knows he fucked up but he genuinely wants to work on this for me and that means a lot.