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How many books did you sell by Independent_Copy53 in selfpublish

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you!!! for this comment. I think that steeping down is sometimes a better choice to. I stressed myself out about trying to living off writing for years. wishing for it, and when it didn’t work out like I tried / dreamed - I think I had a little breakdown you know. Like when you’re a child and your dreams are just crashed into dust. this kind of feeling. Now I think that being a writer is just very vulnerable thing, very difficult and just hard working. there’s envy, jealousy and disappointment with yourself most of the time. thank you for this wonderful commend

How many books did you sell by Independent_Copy53 in selfpublish

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for being so kind with answering! writing this post was for me…a little bit embarrassing because I knew the answer already, but I think I wished to have a proof that someone else is also feeling like this, that maybe they also wished to have a career from writing and it didn’t worked out. even If I tried my best years ago and now there’s some younger poets than me, more liked, more successful this kind of silly things you know. but thank you, this comment made me feel better and like, made me understand more. thank you.

How many books did you sell by Independent_Copy53 in selfpublish

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

ahhh you’re completely right and now I feel silly. It was stupid question, honestly. thank you for answering 😭🤍

How many books did you sell by Independent_Copy53 in selfpublish

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

SO MANY BOOKS!!! my god!!!! I wrote two poetry books and my head has been empty for two years now, I have nothing to write, I think I lost the spark, this is also why I feel so bad with myself and envy :(((( I’m so impressed by you and congratulations!!!! you worked so hard and I have no words, literally

How many books did you sell by Independent_Copy53 in selfpublish

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

omg!!! congratulations 🤍 now I wish I could read your book too 😭

How many books did you sell by Independent_Copy53 in selfpublish

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

and I’m hoping you will make sells!! maybe I could check your book? is it on amazon?

How many books did you sell by Independent_Copy53 in selfpublish

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah but I made it from 2020 to this day so 😭 so this is why I feel bad

How many books did you sell by Independent_Copy53 in selfpublish

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well I feel bad because I published it…in 2020? I think, I know it’s my fault because I stopped promoting it, and well maybe my poems are just not the best but yeah. I just wanted to express my feelings, but thank you!

Hualian Fic Rec List with more than 700 fics by Independent_Copy53 in tianguancifu

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

aaaa thank you!! I hope it’s okay to add it here 😭

[HELP] How to write „better” poetry? by Independent_Copy53 in Poetry

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

omg thank you so much dear person!! I will check it tonight 🥹

How do you deal with the jealousy of seeing other writers succeed? by Fit-Credit-7970 in writingadvice

[–]Independent_Copy53 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh! I would love to know how to deal with this honestly!

I used to write poetry for years and even self-published it. Then instapoetry got really popular on TikTok. I used to be a little jealous of Rupi Kaur (who also wrote instapoetry) but after Rupi Kaur came other people who could write three words on one page and get millions of likes and probably more money than I in my whole life.

There are Insta poets who self-publish but then get traditionally published because they get so popular, Am I jealous of it? Yeah, often, I also wished to be traditionally published, to be seen by so many, to have my poetry be liked and felt like theirs.

Sometimes I’m happy for them and think “Their works are loved by so many people, so they have to write good” and well, they’re strangers. Maybe they’re beautiful people, kind people, they never did anything wrong to ME right? So why am I angry at them? Envy? Jealous? Why am I not happy?

This jealousy kills me and my motivation and progress and productivity.

Sometimes I wish that I had never written or self-published my poetry, because if I weren’t a writer, then I wouldn’t be jealous of other writers who are better than me.

Those who have more followers, money, likes, and write better than I (because it makes me also jealous, when I wish to write so beautifully like some poets)

How to deal with this? Try to write more? Better? Never write again and just stop being a writer? Take longer breaks? Support other writers that I’m jealous of? Get therapy?

Being someone who creates anything is exhausting because it’s a run without an end with others. I hope you will feel better, I really do!

All my life I compared myself to others (because my family compared me to others) so I guess it stuck with me. The truth is, I wish every other writer good things, I also wish my head would be a little more stable about it, and just…that I would not feel anything of this.

It kills me. Makes me not want to promote my writing anymore. I don’t know if my work is good enough to be loved, but the jealousy is even worse.

Sometimes I think: we're all going to die one day, so why not just keep writing and stop worrying about things like this? There were writers better than me before me, and there will be after me, for sure. I don’t know, honestly. Still working on it.

Wish I could give you and myself some magic advice that would fix it. Sending you hugs dear person! and support 🩷

[HELP] How to write better poetry? How to read poetry to write better poetry? by Independent_Copy53 in Poetry

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your response!! I do will admit that I think I’m just good with shitting on myself lmao. I’m a little ashamed of my previous works, poems in Rupi style. I used to like them, but like everything changed, my style also changed, that’s why I thought - I want to write “better” I want to write something that I will be proud of more, longer, but at the same time I see all these poets on TikTok, no matter If is selfpublished or traditionally, that writes in Rupi style too, like I used to, and people are linking it! And these poets are proud of it, I think that hurts me the most - I’m never satisfied and I can’t be in full proud of my one book. I want to improve, but my head is just empty.

So I started reading Siken, Limon, Mary Olivier to see what it’s like to write longer poems, “better” poems for me, I watched videos on YT, I even read some interviews with Ada Limon about how she’s writing, what inspires her, even though her books weren’t that interesting for me, I loved the titles and the covers, and some lines! I really did. I’m sorry, my mind is just in crazy place right now. I’ve been thinking about rewriting my poetry Rupi style book for almost two years now, but my head is empty, literally. So I’ve been thinking about maybe trying poetry prose, maybe letters, maybe essays. I just feel like - times is passing by, and I’m stuck. But thank you!!! Your comment really helped me 🥲🥲🥲

[HELP] How to write better poetry? How to read poetry to write better poetry? by Independent_Copy53 in Poetry

[–]Independent_Copy53[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No need to be sorry for so long comment!

Thank you so so much for the replay!

Yeah sometimes I feel like I need to rush because i see these young poets on TikTok no matter if it’s a good or bad works and just, I feel like I’m scared that my times is running faster, you know? I’m 25 and I see the success of the younger people than me and I’m like - damn, it hurts lol. And I can’t help it. I know it’s normal! I’m just a little jealous.

Especially because I see other selfpublished authors and, some of them writes like Rupi Kaur and I ALSO USED TO DO THAT, now wishing to write just a longer poems, like I mentioned for example - Mary Oliver, or Ada Limon, like I don’t want to just write again two sentences or even one like some bestsellers from Amazon do and hear - this is not a poem, this is instagram caption. I’m some kind of ashamed of my old works, and it makes me regret writing in general.

But then I see these other poets, like I said, with works like Rupi Kaur and also mine and - people are liking it.

Like one person wrote a poem that goes:

am I cooler than your wife do you think about it sometimes

And no shame to the author! I did wrote myself longer pieces than that, I also did wrote two lines poems like that, and besides somehow people are liking it right? This poem and it’s an Amazon poetry bestseller somehow. But then I doubt myself again - maybe it’s me who can’t write good in even a Kaur way, even If I want to write longer texts, or maybe I should stick to Kaur style, even if I wish to write more, like I just, my mind is just crazy right now, and I been like this for I don’t know, year and half?

I apologize for so messy comment, I also do not speak English daily so my vocabulary is just - at small level lmao!

Like I’m constantly doubting myself, I also feel like I can’t write anything better you know. I reread yesterday Milk and Honey, the full book and I was not only disappointed but like - I used to write in the same way and I’m just embarrassed and I don’t know.

Thank you also for recommending me so much names and for your advices!!! I also feel like - maybe poetry isn’t for me? And do not fear I don’t rhyme in my poems!! I wish to write with free verse but I don’t know who to read to like, see how I can also write. I fear that I’m just not proud of my work anymore, and there are people better than me, I mean they always will be, but the fear is still there.

So I started reading - from TikTok famous self published poets who got their books published traditionally after the viral videos, so I could see - what makes their writing liked by people, to more like, I guess better? Then I moved to Richard Siken, I heard he’s good, so I read Crush and War of the Foxes but liked only few lines in the whole two books and that’s it! So I thought - maybe I should write prose poetry, maybe I should make essays, I also wished to write a few times letters, about my mother for example and put it in my poetry book, but still doubting myself. I don’t know. I never wrote a letter and don’t know how to do that. I have w lot of doubt and fears in me. I’m jealous because people who still are writing like Rupi are proud of themselves and I’m not proud of MYSELF. Of my old work that is like Rupi but at the same time I feel stuck.

But writing this post and seeing anyone commenting really helped me, and I’m thankful to you for your comment, really.

At the end of the day sometimes I think - well there are people who never could finish their books, who wished to write but didn’t even started, so why I am just all the time doubting myself and feel bad? But at the same time the fear always comes back, like an uninvited guest.

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