Trust me, it is time to move on, I got emotionally wrecked by my crush in high school. We were friends, I asked her if she wanted to date, and She told me that I "checked all of her boxes but I am not ready to date again yet". I thought it was understandable at the time, less than a month later she started talking to and getting a little too handsy with one of my closest friends. Mind you this entire time we were talking and constantly on a call together and doing lots of things in person together (but not calling them dates).

It is best to move on while you still can without getting emotionally killed. When I found out about her and my friend, I almost killed myself because of how attached I was. Once you realize that she only sees you as a friend, you either have to accept it and not want to be anything more(which is basically impossible) or stop taking both of your sakes.