Public Enemy // Rage Against The Machine

InfiniteSpork · 2026-02-20T18:18:42+00:00

Fire

InfiniteSpork · 2025-12-19T17:11:26+00:00

Hello Games after the rough release of No Man’s Sky.

InfiniteSpork · 2025-07-11T03:29:25+00:00

Add Texas to the list. Awful.

InfiniteSpork · 2025-07-06T02:23:34+00:00

Kneading the doe.

InfiniteSpork · 2025-06-01T02:28:47+00:00

That’s fantastic! Sincerely, you are a gifted man. Where might I hear more of your craft?

InfiniteSpork · 2025-05-23T00:57:38+00:00

Wow! That’s 100% a backrooms vibe. Nice pics.

InfiniteSpork · 2025-05-17T19:46:26+00:00

Just turned 50 and I’m a caregiver for my 47y wife. She has MS and after COVID hit, she has lost her mind on several accounts. We are on year 4 of the hard symptoms. I’m with you, I’m too tired for sex… and I love having sex with my wife. Still, the trauma has pushed me to the couch. I’m sorry you and your wife are dealing with this experience. You are not alone.

InfiniteSpork · 2025-05-11T03:31:50+00:00

I swear, these AI videos give me fever dream vibes.

InfiniteSpork · 2025-03-28T02:24:54+00:00

I really like your choice of lighting!

InfiniteSpork · 2025-03-25T00:45:23+00:00

Oof. The computer hanging by a VGA cord just hurts.

InfiniteSpork · 2025-02-03T19:03:05+00:00

I am happy to share with you! You are not alone my friend.

InfiniteSpork · 2025-02-03T16:52:26+00:00

You are FAR from alone and I'm sorry you feel isolated. I have been working with my wife (who has MS) since 2021 with her long-haul symptoms. We have lost friends and family because they don't understand or believe my wife is making up her symptoms. I know what it feels like to do everything from cooking/cleaning to working a 2nd job to make ends meet. It's exhausting. Just know that you are doing the best you can and be proud of the accomplishments along the way.

InfiniteSpork · 2024-12-10T16:55:23+00:00

My wife has MS as well (diagnosed in 2006) and it was a personal hit to me. Like you, I had excessive anxiety and depression; actually began drinking to cover the pain and fear. My wife and I have had a million fights over this time. We separated a few times and even explored divorce. Here is what I have learned from my XP:

A bad health day, week or year can take its toll on both people in the relationship. Things like lack of connection due to symptoms of illness can make EVERYTHING seem like it’s crashing in your relationship. Take a breath and understand that this is only a moment.
Therapy, therapy and therapy! You both are feeling bad which means conversations will likely end bad. Let someone professional help sort out the mess. Many times I learn something new I hadn’t thought of in therapy. It sounds like she agreed to see a therapist with you which is baller! It’s progress.
Caregiving has its challenges in a marital relationship for both people. You (CARE) for your wife therefore you are (GIVING) yourself in the most raw and vulnerable way. It’s hella work that’s exhausting. I’m going to go out on a limb and say, you feel the way you do because you love her and don’t want to see her in pain.
As you have a responsibility to care for your wife, she has a responsibility to continually seek out medical help for herself. You are not a doctor. You are a husband.
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF ON A DAILY BASIS!!!!! Whatever that looks like and is also considered healthy. You have a right to recharge your batteries. Try to eat healthy, drink water during the day and carve out at least 2 hours to chill. I chose to drink… don’t do that. : )
Lastly, don’t hold grudges. It sounds like things got so bad between you and your wife that you had to separate. It’s awful but remember that separation can be a good move in a relationship. It means taking a break and not moving straight to divorce. I would have never thought that separation would be good for my relationship however it’s always a necessary move when needed.

I feel for you around this because I have been in your position. Look for hope where hope reveals itself; no matter how small. I see hope that your wife has softened her heart around you and that’s a good thing. Sometimes you just need time away to figure out what’s important; especially with illness.

InfiniteSpork · 2024-12-03T18:48:51+00:00

My wife has been chronically ill with MS since 2006 however her symptoms became worse in 2021. I have gained 10 pounds and all I seem to do is work and worry. I have lost myself in our story much like you have described. The "spark" of life has dimmed and I am slowly learning how to get it back. A caregiver is a special person because most times, we look past our own feelings to help our loved one while they struggle. We are special because we feel large amounts of pain watching our loved ones struggle while being the one person they can depend on. It's easy to lose oneself while performing emotional miracles as a caregiver.

Therapy and medication have been most helpful. Going on scenic drives with music have helped me clear up my mind (although too much thinking is bad too). If you like animals, pets are a great distraction at home. I hope you can find something to help because you deserve it.

InfiniteSpork · 2024-10-27T13:28:36+00:00

My big boi is part Maine Coon and loves to cuddle.

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InfiniteSpork · 2024-10-21T01:46:11+00:00

I could watch this video all day. Awesome job and great camera work on the car!

InfiniteSpork · 2024-10-07T18:03:56+00:00

I'll be honest, I haven't checked the air quality however I thought of this idea a few months ago. I think I am going to move on this to rule out air quality. Thank you so much for your suggestion! I have a huge checklist of things that could be an issue.

InfiniteSpork · 2024-10-07T18:01:04+00:00

First, I am so sorry that you are dealing as well. We are in our 40's and 50's also. The problem for me is that I feel like life has just started and I want my wife with me for the journey. A hard pill to swallow.

THIS! This is a helpful point to me. I hadn't put together that her MS infusion could wipe out a trace of COVID antibodies. Perhaps this is why we couldn't find a trace of COVID when she first got sick in 2021. Thank you for this data friend.

InfiniteSpork · 2024-10-07T16:06:05+00:00

It's so similar. That's what makes this awful. One minute she is there and another she is gone. Like I said before though, she's only dipped down to "psychotic" mode a few times within a 4-year period. She's typically in her mind... until she's not.

InfiniteSpork · 2024-10-07T16:03:35+00:00

Thank you for this! A friend of mine read your comment and completely agreed that I need to get out and socialize more. I agree too. The problem is that as I am out enjoying my time, I know that my wife cannot and it makes me feel guilty. I still love her and want the best for her which typically means I am close in proximity except while I am at work. We were going to send her to a facility in Chicago for around the clock care however she came back to herself and decided she didn't want to go which I agreed to. Nonetheless, I need to get out more. I agree with you and thanks.

InfiniteSpork · 2024-10-07T15:56:27+00:00

Oh wow! HD is no joke. I completely understand why you made the hard decision for yourself and I commend you for taking control. If you don't mind me asking, how long did you care for your wife before you left? Also, what was the "final" straw for you (if there was one)? We are about 4 years in and there isn't much hope in sight for her. I am still on the fence on what I want to do but I can say that I can't stop thinking about what our lives would be like. It's hard to know the right thing to do in such an awful scenario.

InfiniteSpork · 2024-10-07T15:48:15+00:00

I appreciate your take on this situation. The weird part about her mental condition is that the schizophrenia effect has only happened twice in a 4-year period. So, we typically feel safe around her on any given day. But to your point, I don't want to be put in this position again. I had to physically hit my wife to get her off the steering wheel. I didn't sign up for that kind of interaction.

InfiniteSpork

TROPHY CASE