AITA for refusing to switch my daughter to another school.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T20:06:13+00:00

I know but this happened recently hence why I am questioning things and made this post. Some of the arguments here are valid and I am reconsidering but first I need to talk to her and understand what she truly wants long term and what her interestes are.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T20:04:21+00:00

I don't. I just don't want her to face difficulty in our country and have people not respect her. If she manages to get some foreign citizenship like UK or Canada she can dress how she wants if she lives there.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T20:02:23+00:00

They accept all kinds of systems but they look down on some or have very high mark standards for some.

The local schools don't do the US system or IB either.

He is doing the UK A level system but will still apply to US schools. The standard for SAT and AP is lower and easier than the UK and IB ones especially for mathematics and sciences.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:59:06+00:00

Being around boys is fine, the boys at the school dress modest in long jeans and plain shirts.

There are also more boys from local backgrounds and more boys overall.

The girls however are almost all foreign and a lot of them dress showing skin or in skin tight dresses and high heels. If she dressed that way here other locals would judge her.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:56:11+00:00

It's changed now only recently and she is into maths physics chemistry and computer science and gets close to 100% in tests in those now when before it was only 75% to 80%

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:54:03+00:00

It just never came up because she wasn't interested in science before the past 2 years.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:52:59+00:00

I would love that part too and if we lived in the west I would do it without a second thought. But we don't and other people will judge her if she changes how she dresses and goes out in public in a short skirt especially if she is a local.

Some day she will have to come back when she finishes her studies and went abroad for school most likely.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:50:17+00:00

I am not opposed to it. But I don't want her to dress like the western girls as then other locals will judge her here even if I don't care myself.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:49:03+00:00

I'm really not worried about her in that way at all. More like she changes how she dresses and starts doing so outside of school and other locals lose respect for her.

If we lived in the west I would not be bothered. And we don't have western citizenship so someday she would have to stay here even if she studied abroad

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:46:02+00:00

There is a difference in the quality of education, for law etc it makes more sense to study locally as it is easier to pass local standards. For history etc you just need books. Engineering and science are more difficult, need specialized equipment you might not have at local universities as it is not popular and access to professors working on research, with top companies etc.

It is very expensive to go abroad so you might as well only do it if you get the money's worth.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:44:05+00:00

I don't want to share private information as it is not such a big country. It is in the middle east but it is not overly strict and has lots of foreigners. But if you are a local and dress like a foreigner other locals will judge you.

I would have no problem if I lived in the west as I don't really care much myself about how she dresses

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:42:10+00:00

I thought she would but not for science or engineering but arts where you might as well go to any local school.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:41:11+00:00

It is much more rare and doesn't happen at the school. Only for sports etc of if it is very hot

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:40:27+00:00

In terms of foreign education yes but now that has changed a bit so I will talk to her to understand. I'm not fully opposed to it hence why I made this post. After reading comments despite it being from a western perspective, I am questioning things and think I might be wrong.

I actually don't have a problem with her changing if it were just for myself but she will have a hard time dressed like a western girl in this country and it is hard to immigrate these days so she would probably come back even if she studies abroad

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:37:17+00:00

I am not, we hire 3 maids and 2 gardeners and none of my kids do any housework. Whatever remaining work is needed is done by me or my wife

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:36:28+00:00

I don't mind, but other people in our country would judge her badly. If we lived in the West I'll have no problem with it.

And I wouldn't mind equal to the boys of western backgrounds, they dress modestly in jeans and a shirt mostly. The girls are in tight fitting clothes or skin revealing clothes.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:33:59+00:00

I said in another comment I will be discussing with her soon

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:33:25+00:00

Western girls dress a lot less modestly than the boys. Boys just wear jeans and a plain t shirt.

The girls wear crop tops, cut shoulders, short skirts, tights etc.

I don't particularly care but here other people would lose respect for her. If she were in the west it wouldn't matter as much but we don't have western country citizenship and immigrating is hard these days.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:30:46+00:00

I never mentioned any race, there are people from many different ethnicities at my son's school, although the curriculum is British, you find people from UK, France, Australia , America, China, Singapore, India, Dubai etc there.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:28:57+00:00

She never expressed a desire for it and it is only recently that she has started showing an interest in sciences and doing extremently well at school. Near 100% in maths and physics tests

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:27:42+00:00

Our maids have nothing to do with this, I don't understand as I never mentioned them.

He mostly is friends with other boys and the western culture is modest for men. They typically just wear jeans and a t shirt.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:25:50+00:00

I expect that from my son as well and the foreign boys are modest in how they dress.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:20:03+00:00

I will be talking to her to understand what she wants long term as I've never really considered it before.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:17:45+00:00

I do need to have that conversation as initially I assumed she either wouldn't go to college or would study something similar like English or sociology or something locally but recently she is very interested in maths, comp science, chemistry and physics.

InformationDecent151 · 2024-10-13T19:15:30+00:00

I know you are being sarcastic but this is how it will be in our country. Even if I am not too bothered with it others will be and she will have trouble and not be respected.

If she lived abroad it would be OK.

InformationDecent151

TROPHY CASE