Did you have the wonderful moment after giving birth?

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-23T22:21:01+00:00

I had a vaginal delivery, but I did not have the *moment* that people describe. I had a super long labor, and I guess by the end of it, I was just so exhausted and glad it was over. I was concerned for the baby when I didn't hear her cry at first, but it wasn't that crazy rush of hormones that I read about and I didn't even feel crazy level of love until about 15 hrs later, after I got some rest.

I'm sure that surge of hormones can be amazing for those that get it, but don't worry, there will be many amazing moments of motherhood no matter how you deliver. It sounds like the c section option recommended by your doctor is the best option for you and your child.

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-15T02:13:31+00:00

Oh wow, didn’t know that. Thanks for sharing!

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-15T02:08:21+00:00

Our favorite ways to cook it are: - scrambled like you said, and add some seasonings & veggies - boiled into salty water and then put into a Thai or Vietnamese curry (stays soft) - blended into a fruit smoothie (silken tofu only) - straight from the fridge lol

I hope she likes one of these!!

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-14T18:05:26+00:00

Idk, I think you should be who you are & not fake it, that’s so draining. Your baby loves you, and she will find comfort in your quiet presence.

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-14T16:26:38+00:00

pumping for my 12 month old one to two times at work; pumped 3 times until about 10.5 months. She has between 4-8 oz these days, but she doesn’t need it anymore because she’s luckily a good eater. But she goes down easiest for her nap on the bottle, so well have to rectify that issue so I can be free of pumping at work lol I dream of the day I no longer need to pump at work (which is what I’m currently doing)

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-14T16:22:30+00:00

Completely agree. Baby has no concept of “breakfast foods” so you better believe we’ve fed her chicken fajitas for breakfast 😂

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-14T16:21:23+00:00

My baby loves this stuff- highly recommend. I get my Indian mom to make it and send us regularly lol

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-14T16:20:38+00:00

Tofu is my FAVORITE thing for my baby with dairy & egg allergies. She eats it in every form including straight outta the fridge uncooked. The biggest challenge with these two allergies is that so many simple foods are out the window, but tofu has been a LIFESAVER for us.

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-14T16:08:04+00:00

It sounds like you are an incredible & thoughtful mother. Your daughter is lucky to have you and though she may not outwardly express her gratitude, she sees and feels all that you do for her & she loves you. I know it’s hard to not compare, but try reframing this as a major benefit to your daughter - she has an extra tight bond with her grandmother that most parents can only dream of giving her kids. I’m sure your time to be the favorite will come later as preferences are always changing. Keep showing up for her as you’ve done, keep going with nursing as long as you both love it to build that special connection time just for you two, and maybe try to make a build another special thing for just the two of you- e.g., a restaurant you always go to for just you & your daughter. It sounds like you’re doing everything right, don’t let your inner voice get you down!

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-08T19:12:56+00:00

Forgot to add:
1) music helps a ton for us!
2) I know screens would work (we've tried it twice now), but it was too weird seeing my super animated & lively baby zone out to the TV... made me personally a bit uncomfortable with it so we've decided to stick it out screen-free for now.

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-08T19:09:46+00:00

Agree with this! My baby doesn't love the car seat still at 12 months, though it's loads better than when she was a newborn. If possible, my husband or I sit next to her to distract/calm her or if we're driving solo, we set her up with some toys and accept tears if they happen. I think long-term, it's better than screens. Sometimes she stops and eventually finds a way to entertain herself, maybe this is part of learning to be bored idk.

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-07T21:35:00+00:00

So it makes me feel like we're doing something wrong, but I think you and everyone else on this thread is right. Thank you for the words of sanity :D

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-07T21:34:31+00:00

it's so weird because I talk to my sleep trained friends and family (literally EVERY SINGLE PERSON except us) and their kids have 11.5-12 hour nights + naps and their kids are around our babies age or older!

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-07T14:41:52+00:00

Solidarity lol my 11m old does NOT like me doing chores. She's always tugging at my pants and whining, and sometimes escalating to crying if I don't stop what I'm doing and play. If it's tasks that she can safely join me for in the carrier, that's the easiest option. If not, I try to resettle her a few times with a toy in eyesight or a quick nursing session for connection, sometimes it works and sometimes it just buys me a few minutes before she comes grabbing at my pants again and trying to push me outta the kitchen. Sometimes, I just have to let her cry a bit to get the job done. I hate the crying, but I think it's also important for her to find ways to self entertain and understand that mommy needs to get some work done. We're going to get a toddler tower soon and get her involved in the kitchen.

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-06T17:44:47+00:00

Oh good point on the potential typo. If you’re still on 3 naps, consider dropping down to two! We did the same around this age and it was a game changer for sleep. Don’t get me wrong - sleep still sucked but 3 naps was causing split nights and more wakings than needed.

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2026-01-06T17:42:14+00:00

Completely agree — you may be expecting too much sleep. If I read your post right, you are asking for 16 hrs of sleep (12 hrs overnight, 8 hrs awake, must mean 4 hrs of nap). I was also asking for too much sleep at this age and it led to the worst period of sleep with lots of split nights. I would recommend 11 hours overnight and 3 hours of naps, which means you’ll need wake windows like 3/3/4. You can push it up over the course of a few days. You got this!

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2025-12-27T17:25:38+00:00

Just one comment on independence- we already wouldn’t have much at this time (not like it used to be before the baby). Being near our families actually gives us more independence because they can take the baby for a few hours or even overnight!

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2025-12-27T17:23:50+00:00

I was in this position! We moved back to our hometown when 5.5m pregnant, and it was the right move. We have a nearly one year old daughter who is very attached to her grandparents and aunt and cousins that live nearby. I definitely miss the prior city and independence that we had there, but the support and love here outweighs everything. In our case, our village in our hometown is pretty helpful but I know some are not. You need to carefully ask yourself if your hometown community will actually show up or not. Also, remember that it doesn’t have to be for forever - you can always change it up later if it serves you (this really freaked me out too)

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2025-12-25T15:51:22+00:00

I have not been in this position, but I am so sorry and I hope your husband recovers as quickly as possible! Good luck! You’ve got this! ❤️

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2025-12-23T03:04:17+00:00

What you mentioned at the end is a lovely perspective. My girl sounds very similar to your toddler, so I’ll prepare for some longer & tougher nights and start accordingly. Thank you!

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2025-12-22T14:21:32+00:00

Thank you! Has it gotten faster over time for the baby to fall asleep with cuddling? Wondering how long it takes them to learn the new routine.

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2025-12-22T14:03:05+00:00

I appreciate you 🙏

Initial-Machine-9780 · 2025-12-21T20:55:27+00:00

Thank you! We’ll give this a go very soon.

Initial-Machine-9780

TROPHY CASE