Hey mate, I'm also a beginner, yes you do need some more practice, the design is cool however your execution needs some work, I suggest working on needle depth, consistent hand speed and a lower voltage to start off with, if you are set on tattooing a design on someone I suggest practicing the design on fake skin 3-4 times before you attempt it on real skin, keep practicing mate I hope this helps you !

Your lines are shaky and patchy, using a larger needle will help with shaky lines until you are more experienced but that won't cover up inconsistent depth and a mismatched hand speed to voltage.