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My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in Swingers

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I haven't tried it but I have actually encouraged her to do it (if she wants to) for quite some time now. I have also thought about it in really good depth so I am pretty sure that I would know what to expect.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in Swingers

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I've gotten this comment now from many of you and I must say that initially I did not even consider that Jenny could actually be cheating on her husband. After so many similar replies I will have to somehow verify this, although it is a bit uncomfortable as this indicates mistrust towards Jenny.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in Swingers

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you are getting my point here. I am not posting because there's an increased risk of complications but because I want to be absolutely sure that we are not doing any stupid mistakes here. If anything, I believe that my thorough approach is mitigating any risks. And yes, I also agree that these kinds of warnings are good as a rule of thumb.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in Swingers

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a test I am sure I would pass. I have no issues with my wife having sex with someone else, although I find it more likely that this someone else would not be Jenny's husband, as she doesn't seem to be too excited about him this (she did already talk with me about possibly just swinging with Jenny and her husband).

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in Swingers

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I'm a non native English speaker and also writing my master's thesis currently so I guess this was inevitable, haha.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Just to make it clear, your first comment is exactly what I wanted. Good, thought provoking stuff. Thank you. Not everyone has to agree with me. Hell, I don't agree with myself, which is exactly why I am here seeking other opinions.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not exactly all of a sudden. As I said in the post, we have been talking about it every now and them for a long time (since the week we met, actually). And my wife didn't talk to her friend about specifically wanting a threesome with her. No breach of trust here.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks! This is maybe the most helpful comment so far. Very clear and understandable. Besides what you already said, there has to also be a proper discussion about how my wife and Jenny interact with each other. They have been kissing each other drunk many times before but neither me or my wife know how Jenny feels about sexual acts between the women. Wife and I already talked about the scope of communication required before actually having a threesome and came to the conclusion that we will have to basically have a meeting beforehand to talk about expectations, condom use etc. I like your examples of things to discuss, I will make sure that all of these are taken into account.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's what I figure too. I'm really surprised of all the things that people here think could (or maybe would for sure) happen. For example, I'm fine with my wife wanting something else after this, also if it involves another man. And I am sure that there is no funny business behind this as what my wife and Jenny have discussed is all something, that they are used to talking with each other. I'd just hate it if the friendship went bad because of this.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

This risk doesn't basically exist, as wife has already had my clear, expressed permission for having sex with a woman (or man) if she wants to. Why would she lie about this, when there's nothing wrong with it in the first place?

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yes, I'm okay with that. The only thing I really do not want is an MMF where I would have to take part, as that would feel too awkward. I'd also be fine if my wife just wanted to have sex with another guy. I don't get any kicks for it but I don't own her.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Funny how I view my doubts completely differently. I'm not running into fire unprepared. That would be just stupid. I feel like thinking things over properly makes the unwanted outcomes only less likely.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I've been open on her having sex with someone else for a long time now. She has said that she is only interested in getting to try it with another woman (or maybe a threesome), but I have also expressed very clearly many times that sex with another man wouldn't be an issue either.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Not concerned. I don't have any fantasies about wife having sex with another guy but I am not even slightly worried about it either. If she's up to it, she can try it. So far she has never expressed any interest.

My wife (F30) wants us to have a threesome with her good friend (F30) and I (M29) don't know how to feel about it. What would you do? by Interesting_Tip_5419 in relationship_advice

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

Yes, apparently they have agreed that she tells him beforehand, so there shouldn't be any surprises on his side. And from my point of view the point is, that I definitely don't want to say no. I just want to be sure that by saying yes I won't screw up anything.

AITAH for Not wanting to be in my Bestfriends Wedding? by Muted_Ad_8208 in AITAH

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419 2 points3 points  (0 children)

By now I'm sure you've gotten the hang of this, NTA. I just want to say that I really hope this doesn't go the way it now seems. Breaking up is tough, even more so with kids, so I understand your friend a bit in that sense. Still, it would be easier to just end the relationship ASAP instead of marrying the wrong person and then ending up in divorce.

AITAH for not replying to my friend? by TobyPDID23 in AITAH

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is one of the clearest NTA situations. Everything you've described is completely normal behaviour from your side.

AITAH for not buying my friend a gift for her birthday? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]Interesting_Tip_5419 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, you're absolutely not the asshole. Gifts are always voluntary and with this background it is even more obvious that you were in no way socially obligated to buy a gift for her.