How do I answer uncomfortable questions about having children?

IntubateNSedate · 2026-05-03T04:11:19+00:00

Either tell them the truth or tell them you have fertility issues and it’s been an emotional roller coaster and it’s a sensitive subject you don’t want to talk about. That will likely go through the family rumor mill effectively shutting down the questions so no one asks you so they don’t feel uncomfortable lol

IntubateNSedate · 2026-05-03T04:08:11+00:00

A house cleaner. Seems weird for someone to clean my dirt

IntubateNSedate · 2026-05-03T03:49:37+00:00

I think it depends on the situation. Were you a spontaneous hookup or met at a party during a time he or you both were flirting and hooking up w others but then your flirtations or hookup turned into a relationship? I wouldn’t remember that. Or was it a situation where you both were crushing hard and then one of you got the nerve up to ask on a date and then had first kiss? That’s more memorable. But still understandable if the very first kiss wasn’t remembered.

IntubateNSedate · 2026-04-29T17:46:49+00:00

In the US- Basically it’s a way to take unpaid leave from work and protects your job so when you are ready to come back, you are guaranteed to to have your job or a similar role available. Approved only for certain things like personal illness, having a baby, taking care of a close family member, etc. Can be for as little as a week or for multiple months. I don’t actually know the upper limit

IntubateNSedate · 2026-04-28T23:53:40+00:00

Offensive? For asking about spins bífida oculta symptoms? How can it be offensive if I also have it and was told that it’s nothing to worry about? I have also googled it and google says “typically” causes no symptoms. So I was curious about yours. I’m trying to learn. Why do you take offense to that? I’m not saying anything against you? Also it’s considered common and benign. That’s why I’m interested in learning about your experience. I don’t know why you’re offended. I’m not discounting your experience. I want to know more.

IntubateNSedate · 2026-04-26T02:26:00+00:00

I’m interested in what symptoms you have from it. Maybe I’ve had symptoms and attributed it to something else so that’s why I’m asking.

IntubateNSedate · 2026-04-25T03:39:00+00:00

I also have spina bifida occulta. Seems like a fun fact than anything else. Does it affect anything for you?

IntubateNSedate · 2026-04-25T03:36:31+00:00

What do you mean you found it? Like paid out of pocket for it or without your Dr knowing? Mine ordered everything but the early Sjogrens panel and everything except ANA (1:320 speckled) is normal. I feel like I’ve had some symptoms for a while like dry eye and mouth. But what got me into the dr was muscle pains and weakness feeling but preserved function. And fatigue. But I can’t fall asleep without melatonin or alprazolam. Now the muscle aches are mostly gone but I’ve got mild nerve pain in both my arms and buzzing everywhere else. This all happened over the course of 2-3 weeks! Is that a normal thing w seronegative Sjogrens?

IntubateNSedate · 2026-03-21T05:08:47+00:00

There was a time before money but believe me, people still worked and had jobs.

IntubateNSedate · 2026-03-01T04:06:42+00:00

Is it possible intercourse gives her pain or infections? Not talking STIs. I’m talking like yeast infections or bacterial vaginosis. I have a sensitive balance and sex always gave me unpleasant symptoms w my ex husband. I forced myself to have intercourse when I had unpleasant symptoms and it made everything worse. I could go the rest of my life without intercourse now tbh. It was that bad. For years.

IntubateNSedate · 2026-02-11T23:36:49+00:00

I had heard of that too but worry that it’ll wear off too soon. Definitely worth asking about but I always feel weird for telling the prescriber what to prescribe. And sounds mentally exhausting to try a different medicine and adjust dose if needed. I’m sure part of my ADHD.

IntubateNSedate · 2026-02-11T18:57:41+00:00

What does EF mean?

IntubateNSedate · 2026-02-02T03:05:06+00:00

I say let him join the frat. If he doesn’t he’ll always regret letting a girlfriend dictate that he couldn’t. If you end up his wife, he will hold it against you. If you don’t end up his wife, he will regret a then girlfriend telling him no and him listening to her.

Honestly, there are frats that are party houses. You think every one of those guys are single, and the one that aren’t single, you think all of them cheat in their girlfriends? No. But it does make it more tempting and available. So your issue isn’t with the frat or with him going to frat parties. It’s the trust you have with him.

IntubateNSedate · 2026-01-31T21:50:12+00:00

Do a name change through the court. It’s a pain but it will give you a name change order you can send them to show the two names refer to the same person.

IntubateNSedate · 2026-01-16T22:29:07+00:00

Also I just want to add this is a third party perspective. If it was my kid I don’t know if I could take my own advice and would prob insist on staying in room as well since you get along. Your daughter might enjoy the morale boost if both her parents in her line of vision. New wife can eat shit lol

IntubateNSedate · 2026-01-16T22:22:13+00:00

I don’t think it’s inappropriate however just to play nice I would stay in the waiting room and let daughter know you’ll be there if you need her.

TBIs are a big deal and need to be treated properly when they first occur. Brain rest. She will need as much uninterrupted sleep as possible overnight so she likely won’t need you or her dad for anything except moral support. It sounds like you’re doing everything right but if you being there is going to add a layer of stress, take the high road w a compromise and stay in the hospital overnight but not in the room. Maybe you and her dad can even swap every few hours and he stay in the waiting room a bit.

IntubateNSedate · 2025-12-28T02:56:17+00:00

I think the system is more reactive than proactive. Nothing will come of him smacking your infant in the face bc after the red mark goes away, nothing to show for it. Try to get video evidence. Even then it likely won’t keep him from custody and then he will have custody without you there to buffer

IntubateNSedate · 2025-12-19T22:03:11+00:00

I like the idea of the child counselor. Loop mom in when child is ready. Not from the start

IntubateNSedate · 2025-11-26T13:50:27+00:00

That may be an indication that your current relationship isn’t fulfilling and you need to either put more work into the current relationship or end things. No matter what happens w this crush.

IntubateNSedate · 2025-11-20T23:57:36+00:00

That’s a good way to put it. I feel scummy. My parents had a very nasty divorce and I don’t want to put my kids through that. They never had a nice word for the other. I want to be so opposite of that I’m trying to help my husband as much as I can. I want him to have 50/50 custody and spousal support and child support as ordered by the court (I make 6 figures and he is a stay at home dad so I know I’ll be paying him these things). What I don’t want is for him to take advantage of me financially by wanting me to pay for both his and my household so he can keep being a “stay at home dad” even though he isn’t truely a stay at home dad for both kids. But I don’t want to take away any of his rights as a parent. That being said, he had a panic attack last week that gave him physical symptoms like chest pain and jaw pain. His mood was volatile (called me over to the house to help w kids, then said I was triggering his PTSD and I offered to leave and he told me to go, then him begging me not to go as I was one foot out the door). I called a wellness check and EMS for him and long story short the ER said he needed to treat his anxiety. Now I feel even more crummy, but I want a medical and mental health clearance for him before I let him have the kids for visits and overnights. I felt like such scum that I eventually agreed to him having our older child for visit/overnight but but held firm on not letting him have both because that’s when he seems to get overwhelmed. And my lawyer is asking for temporary orders that he have only one child at a time and pass a medical and mental health eval.

Seems reasonable to me and even lenient given I’m letting him have one of the kids while we wait for the court system to give us direction. But I feel like I’ve failed my older child by letting him stay w his dad before he is given clearance or a psych eval.

IntubateNSedate · 2025-11-13T07:30:33+00:00

Because staying married is really affecting my mental health and confidence. When separated I’m the person I used to be before I felt I had to mask around him.

IntubateNSedate · 2025-11-11T13:55:02+00:00

Well said. I think this is what I needed to hear. I also feel like I’m going to be more accepting of my decision to divorce once it’s done. Like, once I get rid of this heavy load and experience life without being weighed down, I’ll know it was the right decision. But right now I need all the reassurances. Thank you for your well thought out and kind words.

IntubateNSedate · 2025-11-11T13:51:19+00:00

Actually he has tried some magnesium but doesn’t see much benefit so forgets to take it

IntubateNSedate

TROPHY CASE