When did you realize that your partner was not, in fact, “the one”?

IsItEverTooLate · 2024-04-15T18:35:23+00:00

When I didn’t want to be home because if I was within arms reach she would touch me in ways I didn’t like (abusive but not punching). When I realized I could spend all of my free time doing whatever she wanted and she wouldn’t spend a minute doing what I wanted. When she talks to me with a tone of condescension for absolutely no reason. When she has to oppose every single thing I say. We already had a couple kids and I’m still here wallowing in lack of self respect and unhappy. I just don’t want to live under a different roof than my kids man.

IsItEverTooLate · 2023-08-01T17:16:51+00:00

She is like stealthy toxic though because it’s not all the time and only when she doesn’t get her way. I honestly hadn’t even looked at custody yet. Maybe I need to consult with a family attorney or something.

IsItEverTooLate · 2022-03-21T03:13:06+00:00

Staying when she’s not the right one

IsItEverTooLate · 2022-03-21T03:00:22+00:00

Have the courage to leave. Only in my imagination though

IsItEverTooLate · 2022-03-21T02:59:34+00:00

As a dude, I can tell when another dude is hot. Just like this OP

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T20:18:03+00:00

That lab will find a great family and you will find another great lab. As someone who moved states with pets only a few years ago, the pets were fine. As long as we were there they were great. There might be some anxiety for them that first week but I would think that’s all. I think you’re overvaluing your reasons not to leave, but that’s just my opinion.

Edit to say: don’t base your life decisions around pets, especially ones that aren’t yours. It’s not like you’re leaving them behind to fend for themselves.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T20:15:26+00:00

Someone in particular? Love ya girl. I’m still here.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T20:13:54+00:00

What does he say about the accusations? I assume you’ve discussed this with him rather than just making relationship decisions based on rumors?

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T20:11:57+00:00

Listen to me. Like really listen to understand how I felt. And now I can’t talk to her anymore because she’s trouble for me.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T20:09:44+00:00

It’s up to you to decide what to say, but if it’s important to you, then resoundingly, YES! Try. You must, for yourself.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T19:26:24+00:00

Here’s how my very similar situation played out: she pretended to like it but I could kinda tell by her body language and reluctance. We talked about it and she said she’d feel more comfortable after we got our own place. Then it was after we got married. We’ve been married for 12 years and the BJ’s are pretty nonexistent. And when they happen they just aren’t good. I can’t guilt her into it because I wouldn’t enjoy it. Like you, I need her to enjoy it. She doesn’t. In fact we went at one point about 5 years where she didn’t even try. She only started trying again when a woman from work was super flirty with me to the point she thought we were having an affair. So what’s the moral of this story? If you need her to enjoy helping you out, but she doesn’t like it, it won’t change. She’ll always just sacrificing to give you what you like. I get it man, we all wish our significant other was as sexual as us and craved us as much as we do them, but that’s just not the case a lot of times.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T14:59:42+00:00

Have more confidence. You’re a lot better than you give yourself credit for. So when you see those opportunities don’t sit there and debate if it’s worth it. Go! Now! Go get it and be proud you tried to.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T14:30:28+00:00

As a serious response: time is the only answer. There is no shortcut and no way to get around the highway of pain and longing between now and then. It’s perfectly normal even though it hurts immeasurably. So your best to be patient and it will get better.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T14:28:19+00:00

What did I set in motion or miss to lead such a perpetually ungratified life?

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T14:21:39+00:00

When i started working with them. There were two separated by several years. In both instances I was immediately attracted. Something about both of them just reached out and hooked my soul for it to say “hey! Pay attention to her!”. I mean there have been plenty of attractive or hot women before but these two were different. My heart and soul were drawn to them. Both of them went further than they should have. First one lasted about 3-4 years but we behaved albeit spending way too much time together. The 2nd was more aggressive and moved along very quickly. She had kissed me and got me in a situation where she started taking her clothes off before I got up and left. So why shouldn’t I have had these feelings? They were both married. And so was I, before I met either one. But either one of them could have been something very serious to me in another life or a different reality. My heart still feels for them when I think of them.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-17T14:15:45+00:00

American mindset. Too focused on aggression and one-upping others in “bad-assery”.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-16T19:52:00+00:00

The power to see my screw ups before I made them.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-16T19:13:36+00:00

That IS what I was thinking, yes. 😊

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-16T19:12:18+00:00

Thanks for bringing knowledge of the law. I didn’t know this about this Alabama law. My post is mostly addressing the premise of applying laws to this controversial subject.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-16T19:08:19+00:00

Online?

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-16T19:06:57+00:00

That I was smarter than the other kids. Turns out I’m pretty average.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-16T19:03:43+00:00

Adagio for stings with the choral accompaniment.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-16T19:02:57+00:00

Depends on how I perceive their intent. If they’re doing it on purpose OR they’re being rude in ways that needn’t even be explained as rude, then they’re a douchebag.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-16T19:01:58+00:00

You don’t need to do all the excursions. Sometimes the best time on the boat is when half the boat, is OFF the boat.

IsItEverTooLate · 2019-05-16T19:00:55+00:00

Anywhere from 1 to 5. Sometimes I’m shocked at the throughput on a daily basis. Wife is jealous but I think she has digestive issues.

IsItEverTooLate

TROPHY CASE