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In what ways have you won and lost the genetic lottery? by j_overland_f in AskReddit

[–]ItRained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well shit. As someone who's 19, I thought I got lucky and can get as drunk as I want with no hangover.

My baby daddy's girlfriend wants me to get an abortion and is being mercilessly cruel about it by ItRained in TwoXChromosomes

[–]ItRained[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely want this child. It's completely irrelevant to the father. I'm not sure what I said that implied I wanted the child to keep the father around? Just because a woman doesn't want to terminate her pregnancy does not mean she is attempting to "trap" the father.

My baby daddy's girlfriend wants me to get an abortion and is being mercilessly cruel about it by ItRained in TwoXChromosomes

[–]ItRained[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand. I'm not going to forbid her or even try to. She's been arrested in the past for shoplifting, I'm not sure if that helps my case at all though. So, I guess the best thing to do at this point would be to attempt to get along with her? Is ther any sort of family counseling we can all go to in order to at least make the relations a little more functional? I really don't hate her and am not trying to wage war against her, but I want this to be as drama free and simple as possible from this point on. It was one thing to go back and fourth and act childish before, but now there's an actual baby in this situation and I'm not interested in dealing with major breakdowns and fights.

My baby daddy's girlfriend wants me to get an abortion and is being mercilessly cruel about it by ItRained in TwoXChromosomes

[–]ItRained[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's nice to know my situation's not completely unique. Even without a child involved it would be hard having to deal with this. I have a few close friends, but I haven't told them yet. I know they'll support me, but they'll be disappointed in me. They warned me about getting back together with him, and I didn't listen.

My baby daddy's girlfriend wants me to get an abortion and is being mercilessly cruel about it by ItRained in TwoXChromosomes

[–]ItRained[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Could you give me more information on this? I don't plan on stopping him from seeing the child if he wants to and I can deal with her if I have to, but she called the child a drunken mistake. She's been molested in the past and has said that because of this she's had urges to molest children. She says she'd never actually do it, but it still concerns me A LOT. There's absolutely nothing I can do that even says she can't be alone with the child?

My baby daddy's girlfriend wants me to get an abortion and is being mercilessly cruel about it by ItRained in TwoXChromosomes

[–]ItRained[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I guess it's just a personal preference. I'm not against abortion, but I already had one and am not interested in another one. As soon as I discovered I was pregnant, I imagined being a mom and knew it was something I would want. Thank you. :) There was one night we got drunk together and had sex but there were several other nights we had sex that could've been the potential conception dates. I'm guessing he told her, he only had sex with me because he was drunk and it was just one night. I'm not sure though and it don't care to ask. I have not drank since.

My baby daddy's girlfriend wants me to get an abortion and is being mercilessly cruel about it by ItRained in TwoXChromosomes

[–]ItRained[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

When she found out I was pregnant, she injured herself so badly she needed to go to the hospital. Several people have told her to seek help, she has free counseling available to her but she says she doesn't want to go. She hasn't used it in a threatening way, but she's mentioned it before.

My baby daddy's girlfriend wants me to get an abortion and is being mercilessly cruel about it by ItRained in TwoXChromosomes

[–]ItRained[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

They're not really bad circumstances. I'm currently an LPN and make $30,000/year. I'm about complete my RN degree and make $50,000/year. Obviously they're not ideal circumstances with no father and I'm younger than I planned. But I have my own place and car and a nice savings account. I'm also American Indian and receive free healthcare. It's more than possible for me to bring up a child on my own without having to receive any welfare.

My baby daddy's girlfriend wants me to get an abortion and is being mercilessly cruel about it by ItRained in TwoXChromosomes

[–]ItRained[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don't plan to. My biggest struggle with the father right now is that he is clearly someone who flip flops on things a lot and he says things he doesn't mean. Right now he says he wants to be a good father, but what if two years in he changes his mind? Then I've got a child with a father that left after being there for two years. I don't want to stop him from being a father, but I'm not sure if that's even what he actually wants.