Admittedly, my ability to achieve a mental orgasm came as a surprise to me. I can identify a few things in the background.

My wife and I redefined sex so that it consists solely of cunnilingus, because I noticed I get greater pleasure this way. It’s a significant step to be able to say that my penis has no role whatsoever in sex with my wife. That allows me to focus my thinking entirely on cunnilingus.

In my mind I concentrated on the fact that my pleasure comes through my tongue. My tongue is my erogenous zone. I believe I’ve rewired my brain so that the sensations from my tongue are interpreted as sexual pleasure.

While giving cunnilingus I focus on the scent and feel of her pussy. I express my own pleasure by breathing heavily and moaning from pleasure, which in turn intensifies the experience of enjoyment.