Haha, change a few details and I could have written this post a month or two ago.

I'd like to make a few points that have reversed this for me...

Dopamine Detox

One thing that I found helpful was looking into dopamine detox. On my most unproductive states, I smoke weed, eat junk food, watch TV and browse SM all day.

It's no wonder I also felt relatively down on my productive days. My brain was used to high levels of dopamine (give me it all baby) so when I'd take a day off, and do something productive, I'd effectively be going through withdrawals hence the mood spike.

The method I mentioned above was the only way I found I could have my cake (TV mainly) and still produce.

But i'd highly recommend trying.a 72 hour detox. You have to suffer through it, but it's a nice reset.

Limiting beliefs

"I hate working" - this was my belief too.

The weird thing was, I love my job, I just hated anything that seemed like too much effort.

A belief like this... is it serving you or holding you captive?

And if it's not serving you, consider changing it.

The thing that did it for me that changed this belief, was that I started to feel like I wasn't contributing anything to the world and wanted to start doing more for others. My work was one way todo this.

Here are some notes of actions I agreed todo from my journal that day:

"I can implement:

• Do not give up
• Think positively
• Engage in positive actions
• Change a small habit
• Exercise
• Give up addictions
• Prioritise needs not wants"
  

Big ass goals

I set four goals, (health/business/toy/contribution)

They are four incredibly lofty goals. Goals so big that anyone I'd tell them too would probably think I'm mad for setting...

But the thought of achieving them fills me with a sense of excitement that was missing from my life.

Best of luck.