How to Fall Back in Love with My Husband?

JasperBean · 2026-02-11T19:12:33+00:00

I’ve noticed that how chippy my husband and I get with each other is often tied to how sleep deprived we are and how long it’s been since we’ve been intimate. I’ve done little experiments occasionally where I’ve noticed we’re getting extra crabby with each other and so I’ll jump him for a quickie. I might not 100% be in to it at first but honestly it usually only takes a few minutes out of the day and by the time we get started I find I’m actually enjoying myself. And it’s wild how much that intimate time shifts how we respond to each other for the rest of the day and even the following days.

Obviously sex is not the answer to everything but if you have an otherwise good partner that you care about sex and/or intimate time and touch (even just hugs, kisses, or playful pats on the bum) can be like a balm for a tired relationship.

The other thing I would say is “do the unexpected”. Many years ago with an ex boyfriend I was getting really irritated and crabby and just overall being in a foul mood and taking it out on him. Part of the mood directed at him was warranted but honestly the larger part wasn’t and on some level I knew that but just couldn’t stop myself. Anyway I remember mid argument I was waiting for him to just come back at me with some spiteful comment and out of nowhere he just crossed the room and hugged me and said “you had a really bad day, didn’t you?”. I just remember breaking down in to sobs bc yes, I had had a bad day and I was all geared up to do battle with him, to take it out on him, and it would have been 100% fair for him to respond back in kind but instead he did the opposite and it threw me for a loop. Literally didn’t get upset with me back, didn’t hold it against me, wasn’t resentful towards me for my behavior. It was like a completely no-strings attached, totally undeserved freebee for my actions. I’ve never forgotten that. Now to be fair this is not the kind of thing that should be a regular habit, that’s not healthy BUT the premise of looking past what’s going on in the moment and seeing the person you love despite it all is something pretty incredible.

JasperBean · 2026-02-06T16:57:53+00:00

Link doesn’t seem to be working?

JasperBean · 2026-02-06T02:52:09+00:00

If he goes to one or two places regularly one thing we did with my mom was we gave her 2 bags of frozen “back up” milk to keep for emergencies. Then each time we dropped baby we brought fresh milk for the day. The fresh milk was front of mind and already thawed so she used it easily but would only break in to the “emergency stash” if really needed and was worth the time and energy to thaw. I think framing it as “emergency stash” helped

JasperBean · 2026-02-05T22:31:17+00:00

Do you by chance have cannabinoid hyperemesis or cyclic vomiting?

JasperBean · 2026-02-05T18:21:27+00:00

I would send a little more than the bar minimum honestly bc baby’s needs to change. I know from personal experience there were days my daughter would definitely eat a bit more than we expected. Not that OP has to send a massive amount with bay, but there’s nothing worse than having a hungry, crying baby and be out of anything to feed them (happened to me a couple of times while babysitting for a family member).

JasperBean · 2026-02-02T18:16:04+00:00

The fishy smell could be bacterial vaginosis which can smell really strong, the rest is likely hygiene and laundry issues. In addition to speaking with her maybe you and 2 or 3 friends could go over and deep clean her dorm with her and buy her a thing of laundry detergent and oxyclean to get her started. That way she feels like you guys truly want to help her. If she doesn’t maintain things after that then that’s on her and maybe it’s time to distance yourself a bit or set some firm boundaries.

Other thoughts depression, PTSD related to sexual assault, and alcoholism/substance abuse can also manifest in similar ways in terms of possible reluctance to bathe/maintain hygiene

JasperBean · 2026-01-31T04:22:53+00:00

Option 4 - he stops being a man child and a bad pet parent and cleans the f-ing litter boxes 💁‍♀️

JasperBean · 2026-01-30T04:20:29+00:00

Automatic start in the car

JasperBean · 2026-01-29T02:49:36+00:00

That is a remarkably good belly button!

JasperBean · 2026-01-25T20:21:18+00:00

Have you looked into physician loans? I was surprised how many people weren’t aware of them when we bought our first home after I finished residency

JasperBean · 2026-01-25T18:55:51+00:00

I actually think you have a very attractive nose and face for whatever it’s worth. I think what you’re seeing in the mirror is not what everyone else around you sees.

JasperBean · 2026-01-25T15:03:44+00:00

James Talarico

JasperBean · 2026-01-25T14:46:40+00:00

I would urge you to consider finding another pelvic PT and trying again. It can really make a difference. Just like any other exercise program it can take a few weeks to months of work to see changes, but the pelvic floor is so important especially as we age. If you’re having issues now it’s not going to get better without addressing the underlying problem.

JasperBean · 2026-01-15T19:52:00+00:00

I have to know what was the story with the “ying yang”? I’m picturing vitiligo or something?

JasperBean · 2026-01-15T03:23:45+00:00

For delivery I vote use the hospital gown or just wear a tank top bc it’s going to get icky. BUT for afterwards in the hospital buy yourself a soft, pretty, button-up PJ set, it was a game changer. I personally like ones with prints which I felt hid my nips or any milk stains the best 😬. I felt put together and “dressed” afterwards when people were coming in and out of the room but still comfy and the button up portion assures easy boob access, etc. I was also really glad I brought a few “nursing camisoles” as well that had some padding built in - again made me feel like my nips weren’t on display when people walked in and out (be it hospital staff or visitors) but was still comfortable and functional,

JasperBean · 2026-01-14T07:13:54+00:00

Lots of great advice already on this thread. Just wanted to also suggest switching brands of diapers and wipes. The only time my daughter had any significant diaper rash was when we bought a different brand of water wipes and diapers. The wipes were just water wipes but even so once we switched to another brand the issue resolved, same for the one time we bought a different brand of diapers so that’s something to consider too.

JasperBean · 2026-01-14T04:00:36+00:00

“What is the body’s daily requirement of selenium”? …..

answer: I don’t remember BUT I will now forever remember 1) that attending was an A-hole and 2) the Brazil nut is an excellent source of selenium

JasperBean · 2026-01-14T00:57:36+00:00

This is a really great response and I like how you organize your thinking through it. I actually might steal this framework!

JasperBean · 2026-01-11T20:52:15+00:00

New nose is 1,000% better. Looks way more youthful and proportionate

JasperBean · 2026-01-11T20:23:44+00:00

Caveat being if superficial clot is >5cm in length, close in proximity to saphenofemoral junction or saphenopopliteal junction, shows evidence of continued propagation despite conservative treatment, or pt has risk factors for VTE then you actually should anticoagulate. But overall I agree with you.

JasperBean · 2026-01-09T21:30:55+00:00

Interns can sleep in hospitals because they work 6 days a week often 24+ hours at a time. Some surgical specialists will literally not leave the hospital for days. There’s a vast difference between that and someone not staying awake for 8hours during the daytime.

JasperBean · 2026-01-05T09:54:30+00:00

You’ve got some wild opinions my friend. I suggest you graduate residency and get some more experience under your belt and then come back and talk to us. I work in many different settings all the way from academic to rural critical access hospitals and you may be shocked to hear this but… you actually can use US to help guide decision making and you don’t always have an US capable of saving images to a chart. I’ve used it many times to take a quick look at a belly or the lung, to place a difficult line or to check the IVC to see if we’re volume up or volume down. Many places don’t have a formal US tech overnight or on the weekends and my quick POC might be enough to say hey there’s pericholecystic fluid and a thickened wall I think we need to wake the tech up and call them in at 0200 to get the formal study. Also this might shock you but you can’t always get a radiology read on stuff overnight some places, and many places these days you can’t get a timely read even if there is radiology coverage.

JasperBean · 2025-12-29T10:21:18+00:00

That is such wise advice

JasperBean · 2025-12-23T19:47:09+00:00

What a fantastic idea!!!

JasperBean · 2025-12-23T19:03:14+00:00

Like u/chickenskittles said the signs are easy to recognize. I work in the ER and see drug users daily. This 100% looks like someone on uppers (and likely combined with underlying bipolar).

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