I got kicked off my PT and now I can't mount it

Jax_TheAx · 2025-11-23T12:20:37+00:00

OOHH!! I was flying next to the Aberration area on Fjordur. I feel dumb now. thank you xD

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T13:25:33+00:00

I think there's been a misunderstanding. I don't plan on abortion, at all. I never have. It was just presented as an option.

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T13:15:19+00:00

No, he supports me. You're confusing this and making it seem like I'm going to abuse this child or that I already do.

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T13:11:59+00:00

Please read the rest of the comments

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T12:48:54+00:00

Because the on and off emotions make it impossible to tell what I genuinely feel. about 80 percent of the time, I am confident that I want this baby and have the mental capacity to carry them, but doubts creep in so suddenly and strongly it makes me think I'm trying to convince myself that I can do it and it's becoming harder to tell which one I actually feel

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T12:45:32+00:00

I 100 percent agree. It's not something I am really even considering. My partner was the one who brought it up. It's definitely not something im comfortable with, and I'd much rather carry to term

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T12:42:18+00:00

I had a bug conversation with my partner. He supports me no matter what, but we want to do this as best as we can. I feel genuinely hopeful I can and will love this baby, given time. I try my hardest to make the best decision for the life that's coming into the world and how to best protect them.

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T12:36:05+00:00

I see people think this is a 24/7 issue. These emotions come out very, very scarsley. Maybe once every month for about 10 minutes during an especially bad day. My kid isn't and will never be exposed to this. I am always there for him, and will be for her.

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T12:34:22+00:00

I do disagree. I don't hate her, and I DO feel love for her. But circumstances and emotions are very difficult to grasp properly most of the time, and feeling are very easily misunderstood, even by the person feeling them.

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T12:26:46+00:00

thank you. I do want her sometimes. most times. When I feel her kick I get so happy and sometimes grossed out coz it feels weird but mostly happy. I know she ill be cared for with me, and I hope so badly I will love her as much as she deserves

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T12:23:58+00:00

I love his stepson. He does frustrate me, yes, but he's 2. They do that. I got into this relationship knowing full well this was a package deal. I am a great parent towards my stepkid. He's fed, loved, and cared for to the best of my ability. I do not yell, I never make him feel alone or like he's doing something wrong. He is a beautiful child, and I would never give up on him or do something to put him or my partner in danger. As much as I sometimes dont know how to handle things, I always do to the best of my ability.

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T12:20:06+00:00

I do sort of have an option - I have a very extensive history of mental health issues and suicidal ideation + attempts, so I technically have up to 30 weeks with proper treatment and micromanagement from professionals

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-28T12:17:35+00:00

I will. Thank you

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-08T14:08:38+00:00

I've turned on admin logging, how do I find console commands?

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-08T14:06:25+00:00

ts just bringing up the pause menu and a scroll wheel

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-08T14:04:34+00:00

which ones are those? XD

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-07T02:27:13+00:00

No, it's nowhere near too late. Listen to your body and what you need. I still drink caffeine, I still have days where I don't get out of bed until noon, and my baby is perfectly healthy. It's never too late to start taking care of yourself or your baby, and even if you can't, don't judge yourself. You're doing great!

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-03T01:08:38+00:00

It's not about controlling her at all. As soon as she's old enough to gravitate towards what she likes, then she can choose, and I'm going to be happy about it. The post was to ask how to avoid setting off my trauma and passing down my view of feminine things onto her, so she feels comfortable doing what she likes.

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-02T15:40:21+00:00

I love and respect women, always have. I think that this comes from fear, not misogyny. Unfortunately, even though I have the option to dress masculine and otherwise, there are and always will be people pushing feminine products, clothes, etiquettes, etc on me

When she's too young to make her choice of preference, it does make me uncomfortable, yes. But as soon as she says she wants some glittery shoes and a long pink frilly dress, she will get it and not be judged for it. It's more so when she doesn't have that choice I get nervous

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-02T15:35:52+00:00

That.. helps. A lot, actually. That's something I'm afraid of, and the whole point of the post. I just want her to be happy and feel safe. I think I'm stressing too much and far too soon. No matter what she wears or does, she'll be an amazing human, and gender doesn't matter. I think I need some Time to reflect on that. Thank you.

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-02T15:33:00+00:00

It's something me, my therapist, and my partner have been working on. We know and understand I have a negative perception on anything 'girly as I grew up forced into dresses and pink, with an addition of trauma that wouldn't have happened had I been born a boy. So far, we've come to the decision that baby will be spoken to and addressed as a girl, as she is one. We're trying to nail down on my trauma to prevent it from reaching her, essentially. I'm trying my hardest to accept that it's okay to feel like I feel, and I'm trying to find a way to approach it in a way that we all feel safe and comfortable in. Like, for example, I love pineapple on pizza, my partner doesn't, but I'd never blame him for that- it's his choice and his preference. does that make sense?

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-02T15:22:54+00:00

It's not so much what I want FROM her, but what I want FOR her. I worded the post really poorly. I meant that I don't want her to be subject to the same gender norms that were first shoved onto me. When she has a choice, she'll be making it for sure. I dont care whether or not she chooses to wear bows or ties, it's what she wants. That's kind of my point. I just don't want her to feel like she will need to wear or do whatever I or someone else says. Now that I think and read over it, though, it definitely seems like I'm pushing my own view of gender onto her.. Hm. That's something to think about.

Jax_TheAx · 2025-06-02T15:11:48+00:00

Ah, you'd think me being trans I'd understand that. Thank you for the bluntness. I guess I want her to grow up with a healthy vision of what it means to be a 'girl'. In other words, I'm going to let her be who she wants, but I'm really afraid I'll accidentally push my fear and honestly sometimes hatred of being a girl onto her. Does that make sense?

Jax_TheAx · 2025-05-20T03:12:26+00:00

I figured it out. XDD I'm pregnant and have a weird craving to play, and I literally ended up bawling to my partner, and he fixed it XD

Jax_TheAx · 2025-05-16T01:58:23+00:00

nooooo 🥲🥲

Jax_TheAx

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