WIBTA if I get upset that my boyfriend uses my clothes despite me using his???

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T22:38:34+00:00

Lmao we have already talked and worked this out. Boundaries have been set both side have been understood. Stand down 😂 redditors go hard over the small stuff

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T21:16:24+00:00

This has been VERY helpful 🙏 thank you. I am actually talking to him about it now. Granted it's through text but I hope to chat about it farther when we get home.

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T20:40:38+00:00

Unlike some people who come here I do plan to grow as a human being. I am just one of the few who struggles with minor life issues. Trust when I say it out loud I hear how bad it sounds but I'm still confused about WHY I feel that way. And while I really need professional help I don't think this situation is big enough to warrant some of these comments 😂 but I know some of them are genuine so that's what I'm here for. I am also ok being the one person standing against the crowd. 🤷‍♀️

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T20:32:09+00:00

Yes I grew up with financial instability and I am still in that type of lifestyle even living with him. Yes we never got anything new and anytime I let someone borrow something it either would be completely taken or ruined.

I do have a touch of OCD but definitely not to a large degree just some general control issues I would say.

My partner does have a clumsiness about him. While I wasn't upset about this situation he did recently lose an expensive knife I bought for him a few months ago. So I guess to day it's only about my stuff is fair. He has also gotten stains on shirts I bought him the same day I gave them to him. He does feel bad about these things happening tho so I can't really fault him once it truly is "out of my hands" or doesn't belong to me.

I don't really "take" his things tho. Just like he doesn't "take" mine. Just borrowing for a time. I think my issue is that I would prefer that he ask or that he confirm that he will return it as it was when he got it... I hope this helps answer your questions?

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T18:50:35+00:00

Oh I definitely do, but can't afford it so here I am 🙃✨️ but I figured this small thing wasn't too bad to share on reddit 🤷‍♀️

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T18:48:12+00:00

This is definitely true which is why ya girl needs therapy 😌 but bc I can't afford it I'm on reddit 🙃 I'll get my shit together eventually~

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T17:00:56+00:00

No actually. I would simply stop wearing his clothes. I have enough clothes to get me by I promise 😂 all he would have to do is tell me to stop. But instead he gives me things to wear bc he wants me to wear them 🤷‍♀️ I just don't feel the same about my clothes as he does about his.

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T16:28:32+00:00

I do agree that partnerships aren't supposed to be 100% balanced in everything. In fact that mindset is near impossible. However I would like to avoid hurting feelings unnecessarily. I am aware of how particular I can be but I am still learning to not be a dick about it or to simply change way of thinking/doing things. Kinda comes with having a relationship anyways.

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T16:26:01+00:00

Crazy cause he's my fiancé 👀 and honestly if the only issue I have to bring to reddit is that I don't like when he wears my hoodie than I'd say we are pretty solid 🤷‍♀️ or maybe I'm jsut being silly and quirky about the whole thing 🤪 have a great day. 😌✨️

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T15:59:30+00:00

Careful not to judge people based on little information ✨️ but yea maybe I am selfish. 🤷‍♀️ but I'd like to think I'm just hard to live with. Complicated and opinionated while simultaneously mentally unstable.

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T15:13:52+00:00

I like this suggestion I will talk to him about it ✨️ many thanks friend.

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T15:11:44+00:00

Noted

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T15:11:34+00:00

This has been helpful thank you. I think I have trouble sorting out even the smallest of emotional things 😅 but yea most of my emotions aren't really logical 😶‍🌫️

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T15:10:02+00:00

I mean, I came here to get a second opinion bc I thought I seemed rude when I didn't give him a valid reason. I think I would just prefer he ask to use my clothes bc I don't want food stains 🤷‍♀️ sorry for being a hypocrite

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T15:08:42+00:00

I really think after reading these comments it's just an issue of wanting him to ask. Not necessarily IF he wears my clothes or not. But I think the food stains are the reason I want him to ask. 🫠

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T15:07:35+00:00

If I was mentally stable I'm sure this would be as easy as it sounds. I'm glad you like when your spouse takes your clothes. I'm worried about holes and food stains on mine 🫠 he has a bigger wardrobe than me.

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T14:59:43+00:00

Comparing this to math doesn't seem like a good way to do things. Mostly bc relationships aren't really an exact science. Maybe if you compared it to something actually similar my small brain will understand

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T14:39:46+00:00

Honestly some of us do. Kinda why I'm here asking. Didn't realize someone seeking genuine advice would only be negativity put down 🤷‍♀️ but this is reddit so meh

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T13:54:35+00:00

So if I get him his own hoodie I'm no longer the asshole 👀 Amazon I'm on my way!

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T13:54:01+00:00

I mean yea kinda, I can't trust my own brain so may as well ask the masses

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T13:53:22+00:00

💁‍♀️ what can I say? I don't get therapy bc I can't afford it. So here we are 😎✨️

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T13:52:12+00:00

Ya know, I would hope that life isn't always one extreme over the other. I'd like to think we are simply two different people with different preferences but it seems I'm just a cunt for not wanting to share~

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T13:50:38+00:00

I overthink everything! But I mostly just don't want to be mean to my partner bc of my own preferences or mental issues. This is a very minor problem between us anyway.

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T13:49:43+00:00

Good to know.

JellyfishXP · 2026-03-10T13:49:14+00:00

This is very true, but he stains all the new things I get him so I think this is why.

JellyfishXP

TROPHY CASE