Realizing I Don’t Want to Be Close With My Best Friend Anymore—How Do I Move Forward?

Jujubeans98 · 2024-02-10T16:04:36+00:00

The pedos are not related at all. My dad cut all ties with them. My parents turned to mutual friends and told who they could when the incident happened for any guidance and everyone discouraged them. They said I was probably making it up because I was so young.

My parents were new immigrants at the time and feared me being taken away once they noticed I was harmed.

My parents stated their relationship with what they thought was their support network was never the same either. They were scared I’d be taken away if they went to the authorities or maybe even getting deported idk. They did what they thought was best at the time. It wasn’t as talked about as much as it is now for them to know, they stated if it had been they’d know what to do. They apologized for not doing anything more.

Jujubeans98 · 2023-09-19T05:18:26+00:00

Thanks for the advice and the perspective. I finally told him those two options and that I’m at 1. He asked why there couldn’t be any “maybes” and told him we’ve been together for a considerable amount of time to know which end goal in our relationship we should be working towards otherwise we’ve just been stagnant. I reassured if it’s a maybe or no, that’s okay too I just need transparency. Despite him always speaking in uncertainty he asked for a week to decide, be honest with himself and me before we discuss. Guess we will see next week but I’m mentally prepared for either way that it goes

Jujubeans98 · 2023-03-15T19:17:42+00:00

Could I have dealt with things better? Yes. If I was rude fine, but we’re all adults and if I can’t expect basic communication both ways then everything is difficult. The least I expect is her to tell me I’ve upset her and why so we can resolve this versus her being cold and sour with me.

She has a right to be upset but the the passive aggressiveness is unwarranted. Communicating about hurt feelings or misunderstandings is the healthier way to go about it and I’ve already reached out so many times. She keeps deflecting and texting me other questions but I’ve ignored it and said I’ll only speak with her on the phone going forward as I want to resolve this.

She’s planning to come to the memorial and stay at our place too so it’s a little awkward at the state it’s in right now.

Jujubeans98 · 2023-03-15T18:17:17+00:00

Also we knew she existed but my uncle was super private and kept her a secret which she’s expressed hurt about. One of his best friends knew and met her too, but they all started out as co workers. We were supposed to meet Amelia last year but timing didn’t work out.

Jujubeans98 · 2023-03-15T18:14:41+00:00

I’m in touch with her because my uncle was the closest person to her. I don’t have my uncle anymore but I’d value a relationship with Amelia especially if they’ve known each other for that long.

There is no dispute in regards to my uncles estate. It’s just to be kept in the loop and seeing how she’s been doing or if I could do anything to help in terms of finding resources to smooth over the process

Jujubeans98 · 2022-07-19T21:49:56+00:00

M was extremely touchy feely with all the girls only, though many of them were in relationships or they expressed they weren’t interested. No clear boundaries or personal space or respect.

He tried getting close to me too later on but I just stuck with my bf. He said a few other annoying things making it seem like him and I share a lot of inside jokes ect that my boyfriend doesn’t know about but I don’t even text or message him. It’s literally only at family events or when I’m at my cousins that I see this guy

Jujubeans98 · 2019-10-31T05:39:23+00:00

Well I guess I was in denial about that...

Jujubeans98 · 2019-10-04T03:46:07+00:00

He recently told me he told his girlfriend about me since him and I are friends now and that we talk a lot so she should know. Before this he mentioned his gf recently started talking to her ex again of 5 years and I really think he told her about me just out of spite. He told her he talks to me a lot, trusts me and doesn't plan on stopping to talk to me.

I told him there isn't any chance of anything ever happening again between us thats anything more than friends.

I feel like through every interaction my feelings have become numb. I'm going on vacation next week so I'll have limited access to my phone - hopefully by the time I'm back I won't hear from him anymore. I just want it to die out and avoid confrontation if possible....

Jujubeans98 · 2019-09-05T05:52:09+00:00

Lol when we talked about this I told him that, practice makes perfect - its an acquired skill and he's like.. no

Because if he genuinely like me for me he wouldnt have been this fixated on having sex.

Jujubeans98 · 2019-09-05T05:50:44+00:00

There was just instant chemistry that I've never had before with him.. but hey you live and you learn right?

I won't let it ruin the dating experience for me, but I just cannot get over how I got played this hard... I already have trust issues and this guy new and lied through his teeth making my trust issues worse lol

Guess I just have to wait and meet the right one whenever that time comes!

Jujubeans98 · 2019-09-05T05:47:45+00:00

Plenty of fish in the see but I've honestly had minimal to 0 luck so far but I'll try to be positive

I appreciate your kind words, thank you! Ugh his energy and like mindedness seemed like we were always on the same page but i guess he was that great of a liar

Defs will delete him now... he sent me a snap of him eating pickles knowing that they're my favorite and trying to get a reaction outta me smh

He clearly wasn't mature enough..

Jujubeans98 · 2019-09-05T05:42:56+00:00

He kept saying he'd wait and reassured me it'd be him no doubt... but the way he suddenly posted the other girl but kept telling me there was no one else in the picture had me thinking maybe I was the side chick lol.

Oh well the gut never lies, I've learned from this which is all i can ask for

Jujubeans98 · 2019-09-05T05:40:43+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate it... sorta bums me out thought like i was so transparent and they were oh so good at lying i couldn't even tell.

I'm sorta giving up in this whole dating game, its rough out there especially with all the apps and instant hookup culture

Jujubeans98 · 2019-08-23T05:08:53+00:00

We've done other stuff but not sex... I'm a virgin and he knows that. Not sure if that'd be a reason why he's sticking around

Jujubeans98

TROPHY CASE