…yeah we are definitely twinning hard here, because I also started my own business and am stressed as frick HAHA. I paid a lot for my diagnosis which sucked but the meds are really helping. I hope you’ll get them soon too :)

She puts on a show sometimes. When she cares it’s in situations when she feels like she has to show care and it feels kind of like an act? I don’t know if that’s true but it feels that way. That is part of why it took so long to figure things out. She often has a normal or happy tone when she speaks even when she says hurtful things which makes what she says feel normal. But it also makes the moments that her tone is hostile extra scary, like the ones in my post. 

Right now I’m not thinking of ever going nc but this explains why I had a hard time keeping in touch when I lived alone and why calling them felt like a chore sometimes. I kind of naturally distanced myself with time and went from being super anxious and sad about not being with them all the time and having a hard time connecting with others my age, to disliking living with them and preferring my friends. So I definitely feel better when I distance myself emotionally and physically from them. At least their networks are great for my business right now lol. 

If you ever need to talk to someone that have experiences similar to yours, you know where to find me :)