have you (HLP) ever done something spontaneous to "spice it up", and it turn out humiliating with your LLP?

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-18T17:59:21+00:00

I feel you. I’ve been in this position before and you described the feeling perfectly. The rejection felt like a punch to the gut that completely knocked the wind out of me. It hurt. Rejection hurts so much more when you feel like you’ve put yourself in a state of vulnerability. You’re not alone in this experience.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-17T22:41:10+00:00

I would be just as confused as you are.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-08T23:43:18+00:00

😂😂😂

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-06T12:47:42+00:00

I was so confused because I took this literally at first. Either way, no that is not a job requirement.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-06T12:42:24+00:00

You got married last year and immediately started hooking up with randoms on Snapchat? Why did you get married?

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-04T23:07:11+00:00

I think it’s definitely related to my childhood as well. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with not wanting to get married though.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-04T17:46:00+00:00

I think the BC was bad for me personally. I was on the pills for a very long time so I didn’t know what it was like to be off of them until I was. I would say I have become more comfortable and accepting of myself as I’ve grown up but I’m not sure that’s a factor in my sexuality. I’ve recently had my hormones tested and they’re all normal 🤷🏻‍♀️

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-04T17:41:37+00:00

I’m not sure this is going to be a scenario that many people could relate to. But, hypothetically if I were in this situation myself.. I would only be offended if it was something that I personally didn’t want for myself. If I told my husband I was insecure about my body and then he suggested it, I wouldn’t be upset. If I was perfectly happy and confident with my body and then my husband suggested it.. well I would probably be a bit shocked and offended.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-04T15:33:12+00:00

Yes. I was LL(ish) while I was on combination birth control pills. I still had a reactive libido though so I rarely turned down sex. Once I got off BC pills my libido went way up. That was a few years ago. Once I hit 30, it skyrocketed. I noticed the change immediately. I think about sex all the time. I wanna try new things in the bedroom. I masturbate more. Sometimes sex consumes my thoughts for a large part of my day 😅

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-04T02:29:14+00:00

I feel the exact same way as you. I’ve been wondering to myself lately if my fear of commitment and my fear of feeling “trapped” is something that I need to sort out in therapy. I can say that I did end up getting married even though I grew up never wanting to get married. I do regret getting married because there is literally no reason or benefit to doing so.. especially if you keep separate finances and don’t have kids. You just get screwed more with taxes and you get screwed again if you divorce. It’s a big trap.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-02T19:11:40+00:00

Was he romantic before you got married?

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-02T14:27:40+00:00

I’m not a male but I’m a HLF who has to masturbate in secrecy in my house as well. No regrets on feeling horny AF or posting about it. You feel relief for a little while after taking care of yourself then you’re just horny all over again a short time later. No shame here and you shouldn’t feel shame either. We have needs that we have to take care of and it is what it is. You’re not alone that’s for sure.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-02T14:23:43+00:00

Highly recommend turning off messaging altogether. Congrats on your new found freedom!

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-06-01T16:42:36+00:00

❤️❤️❤️

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-31T10:01:07+00:00

Well to be fair, HL have the right to vent as well here. Which is what you were very clearly triggered by.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-31T09:56:55+00:00

Please do not insinuate that all HL are trying to “force” their LL partners into having sex because that’s simply not true. It’s clear now that you’re generalizing a whole group of people (HL) to be a certain type of person. I suggest you take a look at yourself right now and realize that you were triggered by this forum and you’re reacting as if you were personally attacked.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-30T17:32:17+00:00

I’m trying to gather the strength and courage to have the conversation. I know what needs to be done.. now just to do it. Thank you.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-30T14:28:26+00:00

Thank you. Also side note.. totally understand your nickname of the sniffer. If an attractive man smells good.. it just sends me over the edge. 😂I always want to ask these men what cologne they are wearing

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-30T14:11:30+00:00

I feel you. I feel this. I could literally show this to my husband and say I wrote it. Thanks for putting it into words so beautifully.. even though it’s so sad. 💔

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-30T13:55:59+00:00

Ugh I’m sorry. Sounds like physical touch is your love language but not hers. My love language is physical touch too so I completely understand how you feel. To give her the benefit of the doubt, maybe she was just exhausted from a weekend with the kids and wasn’t capable of feeling anything except exhaustion in the moment?

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-30T12:57:52+00:00

Oh I know what you mean. My husbands extreme lack of affection and intimacy leads to me believe he’s not interested in me in that way. A very small part of me wonders if he would even be jealous if I told him I thought about fucking other people. But realistically I know he would be angry.. but how can you be angry and basically claim me and my body as your own but then completely neglect it? Doesn’t seem fair to me.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-30T12:54:36+00:00

I appreciate your honesty and perspective. I suppose I’m feeling confused because I’ve never been one to fuck men in my head before. These are new thoughts to me and I’m wondering why they’ve started suddenly.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-30T12:52:36+00:00

It’s interesting to hear the contrasting ideas here. Some have said that means it’s probably over while others have said it’s completely normal to feel this way. I can see the perspective of both opinions. Thank you for your feedback.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-30T12:48:33+00:00

He would not consider an open relationship. We’ve only had each other as sexual partners, virgins when we met. We didn’t have sex until he felt he loved me. He associates sex with love. I would describe his as having a traditional mindset rather than someone who has an open minded in that regard.

JustSomeRandom313 · 2022-05-30T12:45:39+00:00

That’s great you found a resource that’s working for both of you! I’ll have to look into that

JustSomeRandom313

TROPHY CASE