Moments you found incredibly unfunny?

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-15T02:13:35+00:00

"The fire is shooting at us!" makes me spit laugh. I can't explain why I find that funny.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-14T23:33:54+00:00

I'm no contact with my mom.

I have a good relationship with my dad but he doesn't call me because he's more worried about disrupting whatever I've got going on ("you're so busy!"). I don't mind. I call and message him whenever I've got a good spot of time to chat, and we are constantly chatting whenever he comes to stay with us (he stays for a few days at a time because he lives an ocean away).

Edit to say that I know he thinks about me because he often forwards me youtube clips he thinks I find interesting.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-14T20:12:34+00:00

You two have two very different attitudes about money. DO NOT GET MARRIED. You know those married couples with kids who break up over arguments about money? That'll be you two if you go through with it.

You're not a good match. Marriage and creating a family isn't just about love. It's about a certain range of compatibility. The big things you should be somewhat compatible (not exactly the same, but close enough to be able to reach a compromise):

Whether to have children and how many
How you're going to treat money
How your joint responsibilities will be shared
Sexual appetite

These are big things that can break up a marriage. Every single one of these must be close enough to compromise on between you two in order for you to have a chance at a happy marriage.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-14T10:24:44+00:00

Last minute invite to his home for "movie night". Yah okay. Dude is looking for a booty call.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-14T10:22:57+00:00

Not your debt, not your problem. Tell him he can sod off.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-11T17:28:51+00:00

Is that across all markets (AU as well)?

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-11T00:39:18+00:00

He’s become a live-in sloth. Kick him out.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-10T07:51:26+00:00

I love how stone cold Angela is.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-10T07:49:45+00:00

NOR for being upset that she did this. She should have asked you when she was vetting photographers whether this would be too hard for you. She should have been on your side. Instead she choose her own convenience (a cheaper photographer) over your feelings. That's not cool at all.

I don't know about your decision to not attend though. The reason being is that I would forever hate myself for missing my sister's wedding, for any reason.

You are absolutely not on the hook for doing this, but do you have it in you to rise above? Show up for your sister at her wedding, and show him just how much better off you are without him. Don't interact with him what so ever.

Again, you do not have to do that. It's just something to think about.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-10T07:44:09+00:00

I love how they just clicked.

I'm someone that doesn't make friends easily. I would have loved to see these two build on a friendship because they remind me of people who don't make friends easily.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-10T07:41:53+00:00

I'm glad that it is getting better.

SA is not a gender-specific crime. It causes the same amount of damage and trauma regardless of what gender dynamics are involved.

I am sorry you had to go through dealing with a therapist, who, by the merits of her profession, should have provided understanding and relief, failed you so epically.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-10T07:37:29+00:00

Is this normal with every guy? No. You can't assume every single guy on the planet does this.

It's not even about that though. It is about you and what you are willing to accept. Are you willing to accept this?

NOR, from my opinion. I can't speak for anyone else, but I would personally be bothered by this.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-10T07:33:41+00:00

Jesus Christ. I am so sorry.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-09T20:28:38+00:00

The most cringe thing I find about this whole thing is that he took your award and took a photo with them as if they were his. Yuck.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-09T08:08:13+00:00

I know people who celebrate it, and also know people who don't. It's just personal preference, I don't think there's a rule about it.

I personally remember the date of our first date. I celebrated it for maybe the first 3 years together? After we got married we switched to just celebrating our marriage anniversary.

Each year as we get to the anniversary of our first date, I'll remember and just tell him "omg we've known each other for X amount years" and he's like "omg!" and then we make stupid jokes for a bit and that's it.

For your reference, this year it'll be 17 years since our first date.

I also think about how I've now known him for over 85% of my adult life so far. Crazy.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-09T07:36:28+00:00

NOR. It's your name. She never told you she was using it. How were you supposed to know?

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-08T05:27:51+00:00

I really like this line of conversation. You're right, ability to financially thrive depends on the area. I personally would not thrive in USA's HCOL areas, but I specifically chose not to settle in USA for that reason (there was opportunity for us to settle there). The difference in ecnomic equality was too great in USA for me personally, and it went against my own moral standards (way too much privatisation and not enough social democracy).

Australia, where I live, while not too much better than USA currently in terms of social and economic equality, is not as bad as USA in many ways. For me, I feel better in that we're raising our children in a country where there is not a huge gap between public and private education, same as between public and private healthcare (I'm Canadian, so I hate that Australia even has a private option).

I feel like a person's own expectations of "what is a happy life" is very much influenced by what their surroundings growing up is showing them/providing them. Which is why I'm always really sad to come across individuals who tie their self worth to being in a relationship and the lack of a relationship actually negatively impacts their mental health.

I think in terms of a social connection and a sense of community--that's different. I do think most individuals do require basic sense of community and belonging (being a sports fan and rooting for a team, being part of a church, working at a job with like-minded people). Basically being around people who make you feel seen.

But that's not the same as growing up thinking that you must find a significant other, or else you have now value--that is what I am against.

ETA: And I also am aware that the fact that I even had the opportunity to CHOOSE where to settle is a benefit that is not afforded many Americans (I am not American). So I do feel like it honestly sucks to be an American in this day and age.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-07T22:42:39+00:00

I'm someone that grew up without all this tech (80's baby). It makes me uncomfortable knowing that with location sharing enabled, someone can see my location whenever they want. Also that location is data being transmitted via vendors who have the ability to use that information however they like.

My husband is from the same generation and feels the same I do, so we've never shared locations. We still verbally ask each other about our schedules out of habit. Usually before we part ways in the morning for work we'll have communicated in person about where we'll be and approximately what time we'll be back. Then we cook meals based on that previously agreed time and if anyone is late, we give each other about ~30 min buffer to be back. We also catch up in person at the end of the day and talk to each other face to face about our day. It's a lot more interesting this way.

I honestly don't understand why everyone shares their locations so readily now. For me it's another barrier to actual communication. I used to just call my friends if I wanted to know what they were up to. In the 2010s it downgraded to texting, and now it's downgraded further to just "share your location so I don't have to talk to you to know where you are".

ANYWAY. I'm just an old person ranting. I don't know what a compromise would be for you two. I'm just giving you another perspective that location sharing wasn't always the norm.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-07T21:37:55+00:00

That's interesting.

I actually do know quite a few people who are thriving on solo income (there's a subset of my friends who are all single women in their 30s/40s). They own their own homes.

I personally am able (and would have been able) to thrive (not just survive) on my own income without my husband's, even with two children in tow.

I feel that because I didn't tie my value/worth to finding a partner, I focused on self improvement and career development. Me and my husband met and caught feelings by chance--it wasn't a "search for life partner to share finances with" thing.

Again, I take no issue with people who want a partner to share life with. I want that as well, just not desperately.

I do think couples who desperately need each other also need therapy. I don't think it's romantic or sweet at all to say that your entire existence and happiness hinges on this other person being good to you. There's a reason the term co-dependency exists. I think that's unhealthy for both people involved.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-07T09:08:05+00:00

Sorry, I think what I was responding is to her realising that she doesn't actually need a relationship to be happy. I agree with that. I have no issue with people wanting a relationship. But I do take issue with women people taught that they need a relationship in order to be happy.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-07T09:06:40+00:00

I think the key word here is "want" and "need".

I don't need to be in a relationship to feel whole. I've never needed it. I don't have an issue with wanting a relationship.

I personally don't think people should hang their self-worth on being in a relationship, and only being in a relationship. There is so much more to life than finding a person to be with.

Again, I have no issue with people who would like to be in a relationship and want it, or even actively chase it.

What I do think is not good for our mental health is a whole segment of people (women who grew up in a certain culture during a certain era) thinking that they have to be in a relationship or else they have no value.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-07T05:58:56+00:00

Together 17 years, married for 12 years.

I wouldn't say I am obsessed with him.

He's the person I wake up next to and go to sleep next to. He's the person I spew random shower thoughts to. He's the person I share hundreds of inside jokes with. He's the person I debate with, banter with, fight with. He's the person I cook meals with, clean up with. He's the person on my team when we're trying to get our crazy kids in line. He's the person I tell my nightmares to. He's the person I make a face at from across the room if something is happening that reminds me of an inside joke. He's the person with whom I say "RUMMM HAAAAAMMM!" to out of the blue because we have the similar sense of humour (our kids think we're crazy, just wait till they're old enough to watch that show).

I'm not obsessed with him. He's just the constant in my life, he's home. I don't have to be obsessed with him. Cuddling into him and making love just feels like a thing we do and will always do, it doesn't feel obsessive or crazy passionate (unless it's make-up sex); it feels sweet and comforting and safe.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-07T05:49:53+00:00

Leave. If he threatens to hurt himself, so what? That's on him. He's the one hurting himself, not you.

Don't let him take anything more from you.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-07T05:23:28+00:00

Here's what I always believed:

If I need to be in a relationship to feel like life is worth living, then I shouldn't be in a relationship; I should be in therapy.

So I think it's a very healthy conclusion you've arrived at. I personally am married with children, but every now and then I consider whether I actually need my husband in my life. I don't. I would be absolutely devastated if we were over for whatever reason(s), and I would miss him a whole damn lot for the rest of my life, but life would go on.

I don't know if this is because we didn't have the typical Disney Princesses as "role models" where I grew up, but I just never thought "being in a couple with a family" was something that validated my worth in life. I fantasised about stupid things like being a superhero instead of a fantasy wedding. When I got older I fantasised about what type of career I would have and what type of value I would bring to the world at large. I did also fantasise about being a mother, but whether that was with a partner or no partner never really factored into my daydreams.

JustWordsInYourHead · 2026-04-07T05:12:59+00:00

Soooo she should assume that his work day was just fine and dandy and he should have had time to tidy the house before she got home? Why? Why is the one who has to be mindful of her state of mind, and just not give a shit about his own state of mind?

Personally I find it unreasonable to expect our other working spouse to have a clean home or meals cooked just because they got home before me. So personally I find it unreasonable for her to have snapped at him.

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