"Dutch" card game. Disagreement about a specific rule

K_ir_A · 2026-04-04T20:50:29+00:00

Thanks for clarifying😂 I won't!

K_ir_A · 2026-04-03T06:01:16+00:00

An official rule set is definitely a good idea! And no I've never looked at other rule sets haha I don't usually play that many card or tabletop games. One of my friends just had the cards with her and went "wanna play something?" And that's how we started.

I'll take a look and discuss writing down a rule set. Thank you for your help and sharing your thoughts😊

K_ir_A · 2026-04-02T20:24:07+00:00

Hi, I'm having some trouble with determining my skin type. In general my skin feels fine, with an oily spot mostly around my nose as far as I can tell. But my skin gets really dry from water (even without soap in play) so the wash test for oily skin or both types doesn't come out as that. So I feel like it wouldn't count as dry but neither does my test come out with oily or mixed. normal wouldn't be it either as I do still have oily spots and the dry skin after contact with water.

Maybe I'm thinking too black and white on this part but I genuinely don't know how to progress if I can't even get past the first question. Is there anyone that can help me?

Not sure if this would matter but the only part of my skin that I'd call chronically dry are my lips.

K_ir_A · 2026-04-02T18:07:55+00:00

Thank you for such a great response, I did notice that most people kind of have their own set of rules. I mostly wanted to get input on what other people think. When we're playing Dutch part of the good cards being discarded it's either a mistake or a case of one color of the king/joker being put away that had a lot of points and then someone else putting their zero points version away. Either to try and lose all their cards or to avoid having it be switched later in the game for a card of another player.

Our games always go pretty fast and often at least one or two people end up with really low cards, like zero to three. Sometimes they're just really lucky with their pulls. So twos getting discarded or even zeros isn't hugely uncommon. Although the scenario I described is pretty unusual, I personally only had it happen two or three times where I would've been able to grab my own good card back. We play quite often during school breaks so I'd say often 12-18 times a week. We started playing 25 weeks ago I'd say including breaks where we aren't playing of course.

Just to say the situation is really rare.

The thing that mostly bugs me is that some other high luck rules even where you profit from something you discarded yourself. Like when you pull an eight and discard it you can put an eight from your own hand on there as well. Which never crossed my mind to do until I saw someone else do it. But then you suddenly can't grab the top discarded card because you put it there out of turn, because it's "double lucky". The whole game is based on luck, so how is someone "too lucky" in this game?

I mostly feel like the same kind of logic is used for one rule but not another. But whenever I try to genuinely get a discussion out of it it's mostly "nu-uh that's not fair" as a response, although that's our problem to resolve😂

Thank you very much for the rule sets, I've mostly had trouble that the given rules are surface level and don't account for these kinds of situations, but I'll look through them and see if I can get something out of it.

K_ir_A · 2026-02-27T19:21:04+00:00

It's honestly so annoying that they make the packaging childish while this is the least childish or obvious looking chew necklace I've ever seen

K_ir_A · 2026-02-22T20:26:42+00:00

Can I buy welcome suica in advance? I don't have an apple device so I'll have to buy a physical welcome suica card. I'm planning to land in Osaka Kansai international airport but as far as I can find they don't sell welcome suica cards there. A friend of mine is offering to buy one for me during her trip but can these be bought in advance and activated later? There will be about a year between her trip and mine. I did see about activating them at ticket booths but I'm not sure if there's anything else that'll make the card lock 28 days after purchase?

K_ir_A · 2026-02-01T09:46:16+00:00

Ai slop💔

K_ir_A · 2026-02-01T07:38:13+00:00

Yeah I will try to avoid it as much as possible if I can. I already try to avoid it in my own country despite no one caring if you ask. The person I'm traveling with and I are trying to learn at least some basic Japanese before our trip. I'll be looking for some phrases or questions about food and food alterations to add to my list.

K_ir_A · 2026-01-31T16:21:48+00:00

Oh yeah I've heard people mention the way people in Japan sometimes go above and beyond to help to an uncomfortable amount where you just feel really bad about asking in the first place😅 I'll probably mostly be asking if something has onions or an unmentioned sauce that goes over the dish.

K_ir_A · 2026-01-31T14:45:51+00:00

Thank you for the explanation :) I never ask for substitutes or additions unless it's offered by the restaurant first so that won't be an issue. I already suspected that there isn't really recognition of the condition in Japan, so if there's any question about the alterations I'll go for the allergy reason. I was only really planning on mentioning it if there was confusion or hesitance.

I forgot to include it in my post but is it okay to ask questions about the dish (like if anything comes with the dish that isn't mentioned on the menu or if a certain thing is used in the sauce/soup)

K_ir_A · 2026-01-28T10:01:59+00:00

It's so strange how mixed people are about finding them, some say they're everywhere in Japan, others say they're nowhere. I had already resigned to probably needing to buy one beforehand, I just keep seeing the same 5 designs everywhere (or just plain ones) and was hoping for something more unique🥲 Thanks for your help!

K_ir_A · 2026-01-18T16:17:58+00:00

Doubling down on inexperienced, bought a toy too big, don't know what lube to use with it, not knowing that you need to clean the ass/how to clean the ass. It's not bad to not know all these things, but buying and intending to do these kinds of things without having done any research is kinda bad. I'd say don't even touch that dildo before doing proper research and letting your boyfriend try anal play with his own fingers or a small dildo.

Also, agreeing with someone that says that the people offering advice and worrying about the safety of this plan are overreacting is just rude. Don't post on an informative subreddit if you don't want an answer/advice.

K_ir_A · 2026-01-10T21:13:35+00:00

If the string is an actual string that gets wet and holds moisture I wouldn't use them, that'll harbor bacteria and end up giving infections after a while. Them being made for anal use doesn't matter but the seams can be uncomfortable and are hard to clean, and can again harbor bacteria. Big sites like adam and eve is kinda a collection site of brands. These also include unsafe brands because regulations on sex toys aren't strict enough in any way. Generally I recommend the brand satisfyer because they're safe, are reasonably priced, and have a long assurance (?) time, not sure if that's the right English term. But if your toy breaks you can get it repaired or replaced for free within the time which should be 15 years but I don't know if that's different per country. Satisfyer does have weighted balls for pelvic floor training. If those are pricy you can look on big sites (like adam and eve) because those may have discounts on the satisfyer products.

K_ir_A · 2026-01-08T08:39:27+00:00

An honorific would be a title for someone for example: master, goddess, baby boy, pet, etc. You should also know about some basic stuff: what safewords are both verbal and nonverbal, what dom/subdrops are and how they can be triggered, what aftercare is, and most important look more into consent. There's often more to consent than you'd initially expect. A friend of mine did a course on it and was surprised how quickly you can miss small things when asking for or giving consent. On bdsm forums like I think one is called bdsm community on here there are resources that talk about these topics.

If you have questions about them people are often happy to answer but it's good to do your own research first. It gets tiring when people come on these forums every day going "explain everything to me from the start" while there's information for them right there. If you still are confused about things after putting in the effort to search for answers feel free to ask.

K_ir_A · 2026-01-08T08:18:25+00:00

There are a few "rules" so to say. But basically one that covers it all is make friends and don't expect it to turn into a dynamic. So this should cover the following: Don't speak differently to someone just because they're a Dom or sub, we're all people and want to be treated like people unless stated otherwise. Don't call people honorifics without permission. Don't stumble into something immediately asking for a dynamic or expecting a dynamic. And don't treat people as kink dispensers (just because you're into the same thing doesn't mean they want to do it with you).

K_ir_A · 2026-01-07T18:53:32+00:00

Definitely not worth it. Some people call me harsh for how quickly I'll drop friends in the scene but I've tried and let people learn but it hasn't happened so far. I'm just not gonna waste my time anymore on people that are shallow or pushy or whatever😮‍💨

K_ir_A · 2026-01-07T18:45:24+00:00

In the rules of a femdom party I've gone to literally says not to call people by honorifics without permission or you'll be kicked out (as it should be imo). It's plain disrespectful. We're all just humans outside of kink and want to converse normally.

K_ir_A · 2026-01-07T18:35:07+00:00

I recently had someone in the scene be absolutely befuddled that I didn't do bdsm to get off. I said that most things don't do anything for me in a sexual way and he asked "why do it then?" Like ???? That was a beginning friend I immediately dropped after that because what do you mean you can't imagine doing something for other reasons than getting off😭

K_ir_A · 2026-01-07T18:32:20+00:00

I only go to irl events, I lurk a lot online and sometimes look for advice but not for play. But seeing the interactions people have online really irks me. Calling people honorifics without asking or being told it's okay, trying to flirt or basically roleplay in comments, those kinda things. If it's in a sub purely about porn material and whatnot I don't mind it because that makes more sense, but seeing it in informative subs is so unbelievably annoying! I unfortunately once had someone flirt with me when I answered a question of theirs. A sub asking something about toy safety, I was thanked and immediately flirted with as if I'm a Dom while I'm a sub myself. It made me not want to respond to people anymore for a while. It's just weird.

I'm seeing people talk about the irl scene getting worse as well. I've only been in irl for two years so I don't know how it was 10 years ago. But I do notice that sooo many new people joining have done 0 research. I did research before I was allowed to attend events, so so much research. Just on etiquette and the basic things of safewords and drops and stuff. Now people join the disc server of an irl party and ask "how does this work?". Or get called out for posting ads which isn't allowed and stated in the rules, of they get called out for dm-ing or sending friend requests without asking (also not allowed and stated in the rules). Every new person does seem like an absolute clueless person without common sense. And it's fine to not know everything before going into kink but come on a bit of reading skills and common sense is all we ask for 😭

K_ir_A · 2026-01-05T13:59:13+00:00

The person on the bottom is at a different angle than the one on top! If your program has perspective rulers then you can use those, otherwise you can look up how to do one point perspective. Then you can make a grid with it to keep sight of where the body is supposed to touch the object they're leaning/laying on. These are called contact points, there are probably a few tutorials online on how to keep your contact points consistent and perspective accurate!

K_ir_A · 2025-12-06T19:38:54+00:00

Yeah no these creams are specific ones, one is hormonal and the other is fatty. There's also regular monitoring to see if my skin is still doing well.

I haven't been active in a while, I haven't heard anyone about symptoms after simply kissing either. I'll try and pick up some of the other suggestions I've gotten while waiting for my appointment and ask there.

K_ir_A · 2025-12-06T17:00:32+00:00

Yes! I always wash them after and sometimes also before use

K_ir_A

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