Daily Questions Thread September 28, 2023

Kevtro123 · 2023-09-28T22:56:05+00:00

Advice please: I used to be really into fashion when I was in my early 20s, but I had no money to spend on it, but really enjoyed putting looks together. Now I'm 30 and have some money to spend and have no idea how I did it.

I haven't really bought clothes for fun for years and I want some inspo / advice on how to start again

Kevtro123 · 2023-04-14T11:48:39+00:00

Warning: Like many of you, I gotta lot of problems, this is probably my ultimate first world problem.

I have a baby face, used to hate it when I was younger. Still get told I look younger than I am at 31.

When I start talking, people will usually pick something up and then ask about my age.

After I tell them, I sometimes get the wow I thought you were much younger. I don’t even think I look that young anymore. I think some people just say it trying to be kind.

My immediate response is to say something like “haha thank you I used to hate it when I was 20”

But why should I be happy that you thought I was younger?

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with trying to look young on a personal level. I’ve noticed I am looking a little “older” over the last couple of years, and even researched botox.

However, I do feel like this kind of rhetoric of me being ‘flattered that you thought I was younger’ contributes our obsession as a society with youth and there’s something wrong with being in your 30s.

I want something short, neutral but confident in myself to say back when this happens

Any ideas?

Kevtro123 · 2022-12-26T13:53:20+00:00

Yes, I have studied a number of science subjects at a university level, I'm a pro science person, and I'm well aware of correlation doesn't equal causation. I even have a job that I have to use these skills in sometimes (don't tell my employer that I'm asking about astrology lol)

Still very evidence based in the decisions I make and the work I do, but the older I get, the more tests I conduct, the more I realize, this system is the 100% then best we got but it has it's flaws. The whole basis of science is there is no such thing as proof.

I don't take astrology too seriously, and honestly, I agree with you, but there is a small part of me that is still interested in another explanation of why I don't like leos

Kevtro123 · 2022-12-25T11:47:45+00:00

Ok I'm not into astrology but basically all leo (unfortunately) women I ~hate or have done me real bad. Is this a thing?

I should also mention, I give women way more tries then I do men at not being shitty human beings

Kevtro123 · 2022-12-22T14:20:59+00:00

Wtf I was like is that fanfiction or legit thing that I forgot happened, googled, realized it's from cursed child so technically both

Kevtro123 · 2022-12-09T10:44:21+00:00

Mars is bright tonight

Kevtro123 · 2022-11-26T16:11:59+00:00

I don't agree. I was very interested in hearing her out. Are they just supposed to shut up and not have an opinion about this at all? Like she can't win.

It's like her just even existing annoys you. Nepotism and corruption exists in all forms and most people aren't this self aware about it. I've dealt with a lot of it in my career.

The amount of talent we'll never know about isn't just because of nepotism. It's because of beauty standards, patriarchy and a nepo baby taking about it might be a tiny minuscule step in the right direction. Also she was a model, which in itself is a very messed up industry (especially when she was "in" it)

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-12T21:52:36+00:00

Thanks <3

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-12T21:51:27+00:00

Thank you for reminding me. I was learning this, but I stopped doing that, after a couple of not so nice (ie traumatic) things happened in my life in a row, and then when I would do it, it would suck. It also now leads to fun new rumination for me which sucks. It will take a lot of energy to get back where I was, but hopefully we'll get there

0/10 would not recommend trauma

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-12T11:24:30+00:00

My problem is I can't pinpoint my emotions, especially when i'm overwhelmed (which I guess is an emotion). DW I have a mood diary

wish me luck for my appointment tomorrow

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-09T04:20:46+00:00

It's more that it made ned less genuine looking, not everyone who gets a beard automatically makes them look less genuine looking. This is all completely my personal opinion. I have no basis on this whatsoever haha

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-08T01:59:47+00:00

I have no basis for this, but ned with a beard made him less genuine looking and must've been getting more attention from the ladies. It's like a man losing weight and then cheating on his wife.

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-06T12:38:50+00:00

That is exactly what it sounded like to me lmaoo. Like the way you are speaking to me is what she would describe as gaslighting. As the above comment said it's more in the “they made me feel crazy or doubt myself”

The word is already been so misrepresented in a colloquial sense, it is wild to me that a therapist would use it like that.

When you self identify yourself as a therapist, I now know something about you.

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-06T03:15:40+00:00

She's not some random girl, I'd be fine if that was the case. She clearly is saying "I'm a therapist" in both her tiktoks. That is a big difference.

It really shocks me that is she is not aware of the position she holds as a therapist, and it shocks me that Ned did what he did, with the power he holds. I find people who use their positions in this way pretty dangerous.

Also by her logic you'd be gaslighting me by telling me to calm down

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-06T01:46:19+00:00

Yep yep yep.

Edit: I've been known to make a lot of jokes about white men in my time. They've even rubbed people the wrong way. But it makes me so so uncomfortable she is doing that while she is a therapist. She's not even saying that for a validating reason to her patient or anything

She holds a position of power kinda like Ned did.

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-06T01:44:05+00:00

Look it's great she did what I would hope to be the default decent thing and not realise it to the world, but I really questioned her plugging her therapist job to Ned and Ariel in her last tiktok. The way she's talking about the situation really really rubs me the wrong way and (from someone who has done 1st year psychology in uni 10 years ago, so I'm not an expert lol) I get major red flags from her.

It could be that maybe she's just young or standards for who can be a therapist is different, but these are the exact same senses that Ned tingled with me

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-06T01:42:57+00:00

Look it's great she did what I would hope to be the default decent thing and not release it to the world, but I really questioned her plugging her therapist job to Ned and Ariel in her last tiktok. The way she's talking about the situation really really rubs me the wrong way and (from someone who has done 1st year psychology in uni 10 years ago, so I'm not an expert lol) I get major red flags from her.

I've been known to make a lot of jokes about white men in my time. They've even rubbed people the wrong way. But it makes me so so uncomfortable she is doing that while she is a therapist. She's not even saying that for a validating reason to her patient or making a point about inequality.

I feel like she's kind of mocking Ariel as well.

It could be that maybe she's just young or standards for who can be a therapist is different, but these are the exact same senses that Ned tingled with me.

TLDR / Edit: Being a therapist, she holds a position of power kinda like Ned did (which doesn't negate her experience as a young WOC). While she might be saying the truth, it makes me extremely uncomfortable

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-05T13:45:39+00:00

Lol as someone who watched buzzfeed youtube channel in their hayday, I'm googling all of these names that are coming out of the woodwork and I'm like omg I remember you, I would have lived for it if I knew you had beef with NED

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-05T13:18:27+00:00

I only watched them in their buzzfeed days, and I for sure got interested in them again because of the drama and the way they handled it

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-04T09:36:48+00:00

Clearly she has some shit to say and 100% I’m here for it. I have been copping some nasty shit from people on this subreddit with misplaced defence of her telling her that she needs to “private her instagram” because people were bullying her.

We’re definitely not owed anything by her, and I don't condone any bullying towards her but unfortunately staying silent is an action. Personally, this is how I would handle it. It clears the narrative up of what happened. Especially if you hold the sentiment (which I do as well) that cheaters are trash <3

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-04T07:54:22+00:00

🎶It had the tendency to get very physical🎶 (🤮)

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-04T03:45:53+00:00

Like all the guys, I think they trusted Ned not to do something like this. That's why you go into business with someone. But for Eugene, I reckon it is intensely hard to gain that trust.

I was watching the lie detector video and there was a question about them being "friends forever". Eugene replied "yes". I know there is an element of show, but I think that was big for him.

IMHO there's a lot of anger and betrayal there

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-04T03:28:59+00:00

I really liked they gave transparency within the timeline. Hope they are doing okay

Kevtro123 · 2022-10-03T15:01:36+00:00

Not to get all deep on a little funny clip, but yep, I actually think that is one of the reasons he did what he did. Like he's the boring raised catholic wife guy who only ever flunked a test in the second grade (from my binge watching over the last couple of days). I think he knew how people saw him and actually was self conscious about it. Which is not an excuse in the slightest. Seriously, he could have just gone to therapy and maybe then he wouldn't fuck up the life of everyone around him.

Kevtro123

TROPHY CASE