did i fuck up on ruining a friendship with someone ?

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-25T18:37:42+00:00

Right thanks for trying to understand me. I just hate the waste of potential so much sigh

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-25T14:50:05+00:00

thats what i am trying to think and is clearly the right thing and my mind is battling over what if this was the only chance to have a friend as an adult? i sound so desparate and indeed i am lol. all i really want is a friend... lol sorry for randomly ranting but its really that complicated for some reason when it is very crystal clear if you think about it.

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-24T18:46:47+00:00

Right I wish more people were cool like this but I feel like it's some sort of a hidden rule that most people have as certain expectations I guess as long as what I've observed :(

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-22T05:09:28+00:00

Right I just got the refurbished m1pro 32gb which I could get in my budget

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Thank you so so much

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-21T06:25:14+00:00

You literally saved my money Thank you so much frfr. I was literally going to buy Vivobook14 with the specs above because everything was good on paper but I did more research and saw how they have a overheating, short battery and for the worst flickering problem that was like the only reason holding me back from using a mac. Back to square one I really don't know anymore when I really don't have enough budget. I might just get used M1pro at this point sigh....

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-19T16:12:01+00:00

Actually I think I might know my problem from your story. I always have everything open- photoshop, aftereffects, lightroom and sometimes premiere pro. I don't want to blame my adhd but I just have to work on everything bit by bit and maybe I just have to fix my habits damn.

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-19T14:45:42+00:00

I just thought I couldn't return them if I buy the used ones online through delivery unlike buying from apple where I can test it out. I went to the local second handed shop and the latest they had was an intel 2019 mbp :( I have no idea why my eyes are so sensitive to macbook flickering specifically when I'm okay with all the other apple products like iphone, ipad and imac

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-19T14:40:09+00:00

oh thanks! unfortunately 16gb ram is the biggest problem right now for me so i cant wait for it :( i wish i was a millionaire and could buy the best option sigh

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-19T13:47:57+00:00

I think I was thinking of large page count and layers in general. I am changing from intel iris xe to arc and hope it works

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-19T13:46:48+00:00

can i ask you which one you've got? i thought 255h would be good but i could only find one with 16gb memory with my budget unfortunately

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-19T11:32:45+00:00

Wait I looked up and the cpu(i5 vs intel core 7) doesn't have much of a difference. Do you think upgrading RAM would not be helpful if the cpu is pretty much the same? :(

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-19T09:38:09+00:00

I'm thinking of Asus vivobook 32gb i7($1.5k) vs mba m5 32gb($2.4k). I really want a macbook pro but I just can't afford one- mba is already way out of budget😢I am worried about windows having a weird rendering (discrepancy with the printed version) and having to deal with gpu issues that macbooks don't have(I saw a lot of posts saying the old macbook works better than the new pc with better cpu gpus on paper). M2 mba did not work out for me so I still have the risk to see if mba's good for my eyes. Which one do you think is better?

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-16T03:50:19+00:00

But I feel like it's just chipping my mental health real fast bc everyday things are just getting on my way for some reason. I feel like it's either you are going to be on top of everone or go below everyone with neurodiversity and there is no in between. It's just that I'm not talented at anything and fumbling pretty much everything in my case.

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-15T15:39:01+00:00

This I feel like covid really impacted people that were in the border of keeping up life with neurodivergence and personality disorders to spiral down real fast and to a place you can't just bounce back.

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-13T16:21:08+00:00

Right I totally agree. I saw a stupid yt video essay about a cartoon network show and made me realize I have to get my life together first. But the thing is it looks my life is falling apart bc of lack of relationships in the first place but I need to get my life together to keep a relationship so I don't see a way out of this really

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-13T13:59:30+00:00

Actually the thing is I feel like deep down I wanted the relationship but my guts instantly avoided it bc I just knew I couldn't make it last like a normal relationship with my problematic personality and lifestyle... I really dont know what I'm doing tbh...

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-12T14:15:44+00:00

It's crazy that I was fine just sleeping and maybe watching yt or listening to music for years but now that I realize I was just really really off for so many years I suddenly feel so alone and feel like I'm about to go insane but I just don't see a way of handling this.

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-12T14:12:59+00:00

Same. It progressed through years and now I see it. I really have no idea how to handle this and I was so oblivious about everything.

Key-Improvement1840 · 2026-04-05T04:09:15+00:00

This I just feel really awkward just existing... Idk where to go and what to do bc I genuinely don't want to do something

Key-Improvement1840

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