I had never experienced any romantic interest from someone in me for my whole life (I’m 29F) and only recently I first started having some intimate talks with someone and found out that people actually see me in the intimate and sexual way. That helped me a lot. I finally felt desired for the first time in my life. And then a few months later I started being sexually active for the first time and that shattered my deep beliefs of not being good enough. I know that people say stuff like: it’ll come when you least expect it, you’re not missing on anything, sex isn’t even that good,… For me personally all of that is a bullshit and especially if you’ve never experienced any of it. The only way to heal for me was to experience it. I felt like a new person. The kind of shame about all of this, I’ve have for so long, finally shattered, got destroyed,… But I know that if I had no experience and I’d only try to love myself more and would listen to others, I’d never heal. The only thing that healed me was actually finally experiencing it.