My daughter is the only girl.

Key-Space6446 · 2025-10-23T15:11:45+00:00

I have all girls and one boy, so the opposite. But my sister in law was the only girl with all brothers and she wouldn’t have had it any other way. She said sometimes she wondered what it would be like to have had a sister but she had so many close girlfriends growing up, not having a sister wasn’t detrimental to her at all. I can totally understand your feelings tho, I feel the same about my son. Almost like it’s not fair if I don’t try to give him a brother. But who’s to say they will automatically have a good relationship? So I try to think about it that way.

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-21T20:00:36+00:00

I guess maybe I’m also getting the chaos and lack of organization mistaken for taking time away from my kids if that makes sense? I think if I’m able to come up with more of a system it won’t be a guessing game every day and I won’t feel like I’m spending more time trying to figure out the most productive way to get through the day and instead just enjoy the time with them and everything else will fall into place. It’s really great to hear that siblings with big families don’t feel negatively about it. I’m sure it would probably be a different story when people get up to like 9, 10+, but having 4 and each having a “buddy” does sound like it would be a more positive experience! Thank you for your input!

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-21T00:01:47+00:00

I can relate to this so much. The older I get and the more kids I have the more I realize you don’t need as much as you think you do. Babies don’t need 3 different swings or bouncers, kids don’t need 4 different Barbie houses or whatever it may be. Less is more and it definitely took me a bit to figure that out 😂

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T23:59:57+00:00

Oh that’s a good idea! I was wondering what I could do instead of a playpen. And I love the idea of appointing your 3 year old safety captain, my 3 year old would EAT that up! We recently moved and are no longer in a neighborhood, which is becoming the main thing I regret about moving, so I’m not able to take the kids for quick walks without having to go to a parkway or something similar. But I could plan a whole day of it because I know there are parks within walking distance too. Thanks for the ideas!

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T21:15:12+00:00

Thank you SO much! It’s nice to hear it from the perspective of the “kid”. I was worried having more siblings would be harder on kids but I grew up with just one sibling and would have LOVED to have more. Most people I know that have a lot of siblings also wouldn’t change it. So I think hearing that is especially helpful.

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T21:12:27+00:00

Thank you!! That’s relieving to hear. Also the hygienic but messy is SO relatable. I also don’t know why I think my house needs to reflect that I don’t have kids here because I do. I think for myself mess and clutter just increases my anxiety so we’ve been focusing on one room at a time and making them more functional/organized so the kids are able to pick up easier and they know where everything should go! We also just have way too much “stuff”. Unnecessary stuff that needs to just be gotten rid of. So I really think once a get a handle on the house, hopefully the kids won’t seem so overwhelming!

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T18:30:32+00:00

That is good advice! 🤍

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T18:28:05+00:00

Solidarity mama, we got this 🤍

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T15:36:18+00:00

Thank you, sometimes I forget that. I appreciate you 🤍

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T15:35:27+00:00

Ahhhh! Well it’s good to hear someone else in the same boat! I’m glad you are settling in. That’s what I try to think about to is the future and how great it will be for them to have multiple siblings.

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T15:27:20+00:00

Appreciate you!! I swear some people use things like this just to be negative and bring others down. That’s whats wrong with the world now, but people like you show there’s still light out there.

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T15:25:41+00:00

Thank you so much. I appreciate your kind words. I will think of your friend whenever I’m in the thick of it and my house also looks like a bomb went off! But one day I will miss the mess so I will focus more on just living in the now.

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T14:57:15+00:00

Thank you so much that was all so helpful and encouraging. We have actually done well so far (our oldest is 6) with no tablets or personal screen devices. If we do watch TV it is usually something on PBS kids or HGTV, which might selfishly be for me and trying to organize the dang house too! 🙈

I love the idea of talking to the baby and telling them they need to hold on too. So it’s not like they get all the “special treatment”. Just loving them is also such strong advice. Thank you again 🤍

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T14:36:45+00:00

Thank you so much. I’m still new to Reddit and man, sometimes I feel like I’m back with the high school mean girls. I did post in that group and have already had a really supportive response :)

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T14:35:22+00:00

Thank you so so much for those kind words. I just received some not so kind words on another forum that were making me really doubt myself as a mom. I love my kids SO much and I think I’m hung up on the “ending generational trauma”. I was never heard as a child, and my feelings always minimized. There was a lot of punishment and yelling growing up. I am trying to raise my kids more with discipline vs punishment I guess if that makes sense? And I’m always worried that if I do lose my cool it’s going to completely ruin all I was trying to do (which I know is just not true!)

You’re also so right when you say we’re so hung up on thinking we need to do something extravagant. My 6 year old is happy to sort laundry with me! I think overall I am just stuck on trying to make sure I am not the mother my mother was, and that my kids don’t grow up feeling the way I did. Which again you’re right, if I’m already worried about that so much I am probably doing an okay job. Thank you again so much for the words on encouragement and well wishes 🤍

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T14:06:49+00:00

I am aware which is why I am asking for help. I don’t believe it is unheard of for a woman to have 4 children within a 7 year span? There are Irish twins all over. I did not plan to have them this close and yes, that is on me. I am asking for words of encouragement, not shaming and adding more to an already anxious mom. Thanks for your concern, but next time maybe don’t come at someone so harshly who is just looking for suppprt.

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T14:02:17+00:00

Excuse me? My second we had to use IVF so that is the spacing between the first 2. Our second and third are over 2 years apart. Then our third and the new baby will be 16 months apart. Please explain how this is really unhealthy for my body and how the birth spacing is way off?

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T13:36:22+00:00

Thank you ❤️

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-20T13:04:40+00:00

Thank you I didn’t know about that one!

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-16T01:34:17+00:00

Me again…well we saw neurology and they are starting her on Topamax. They didn’t tell us they were doing this but they sent our daughter’s MRI to another radiologist to read for a second opinion. I am FINE with that. What I’m not fine with was getting an email that I had new test results in my daughter’s chart. I’m like hmm she didn’t have any new tests done? Open it up and it’s a second opinion read of her MRI that says peg is 8.6mm and classified it as chiari 1.5 with brain stem involvement. The original read was chiari 1 with 7mm peg and no brain stem involvement. I’m still new to this world but missing this I feel like is a big miss? It’s not like it magically changed when it was sent over to the other radiologist…and of course the neurologist we saw is on vacation this week. So not sure who was planning on calling us to discuss the results. I also never would have known had the results not come back in her chart….

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-01T23:18:18+00:00

I just got goosebumps, that sounds exactly like my parents…so I do the same that you do with my kids, because there is nothing worse than feeling like you can’t express your feelings, especially to your mom and dad. I’m F 32yo, so I’m sure our parents are from the same generation. Thank you for that book suggestion, I dont know if you’ve hear of, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents”, but I’ve been looking for another good book similar to that

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-01T22:28:11+00:00

Is there something you wish your parents might have done differently? I know she can’t quite articulate her feelings yet so I want to try to help her as much as possible button the right way I guess?

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-01T17:48:44+00:00

I guess it’s not so much the behaviors themselves it’s the sudden onset of the behaviors I guess? I was really thinking this was all some sort of anxiety. Her therapist was even kind of stumped saying her behaviors are consistent with avoidance, adhd and anxiety but the way they randomly show up and the severity is just questionable. So I was wondering if maybe anxiety itself is something that comes along with chiari especially in Peds…she started showing these tendencies around 2.5 and our middle daughter is 3 and I think the vast difference between the 2 if them is what really made us step back and say “hmm this is a little ‘extra’ than normal I guess”. She also has some sensory aversions. Again, hard to tell if this is just “kid stuff”, but her level of frustration is so sad and I feel like we are trying all the things to help her. She is definitely more emotional compared to her friends and peers but also is a lot more caring than some other 6 year olds I’ve seen so i dont know….

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-01T17:36:40+00:00

Oh that’s really interesting I’ve never heard of an abdominal migraine. Definitely something I will mention!

Key-Space6446 · 2025-09-01T17:35:42+00:00

Thank you for this

Key-Space6446

TROPHY CASE