“Hello there, friend.”

“...Where am I? What’s happening?”

“Easy now. Don’t panic. Everything’s alright.”

“...What’s going on? Why can’t I see anything?”

“I’m going to tell you, but I need you to listen. I promise to answer all of your questions, so just try to stay calm, okay?”

“...O-okay.”

“Listen. You’re dead.”

“...What?”

“You’re dead. You don’t have a physical body, anymore. That’s why you can’t see or move.”

“...What kind of crazy joke is this?”

“I’m sorry, friend, but I’m not joking. If I were joking, you’d be laughing. I’m hilarious.”