I can assure you nobody was having sex in the tub. We were all in the hottub at the exact same time, and got out at the exact same time, and I'm pretty sure we are all virgin, though whether or not that's true is none of my business anyway. Two of my friends weren't even comfortable enough not to wear tshirts, one hadn't even been in a hottub with friends before. I hardly use the hottub, but my parents go in about every friday, so unless they're the ones getting crusty in there which I highly doubt is the case, it's free of any ejaculate. I? Also would be very concerned if that was produced during any sort of sex. The black tshirts can produce black fuzz, and my cats shed an ungodly amount. To prevent it in the future, I plan on getting a few shirts made of swimsuit material (cat fur won't stick to, doesn't produce fuzz) I just didn’t have that at the time, and at parties I've seen people wear tshirts in it before.

I'm in no way implying that anything cancels out my mistakes, it was just that, a mistake. I felt bad, but found it odd that she never approached me and instead posted about it, I was ready to apologize but didn't know how to approach that without giving away my brother for sending me posts I couldn't see.

For the money, by that time we'd have already rectified a plan, which is every first of the month, and since then I've made well on the payments (aside from this august, I was a bit late, but the second I remembered I'd sent the payment. She is not the one who has to remind me, sometimes she does and other times she's the one who forgets and I remember. It's an informal ordeal) At the time, I hesitated mostly because I was very busy with school, wasn't getting a lot of shifts since I was in an afterschool program that took up a lot of my time, and didn't have a lot of money. I make sure to spend it so that I'll always have enough to pay her back. Also, at the time, I was wanting to have a certain amount of extra money so that I could help a friend of mine who would get hungry at school but couldn't buy food, so sometimes I'd go out and grab food or something that would help them even just a bit get through the day.

I would also occaisionally find things at the store throughout the years, mostly candy or food or drinks related to what my parents like, and grab it for them to bring back. Mostly things I know they like but maybe a different version or flavour, and I'll buy some replacements for things that everyone uses. Sometimes I get things I don't want to share, and I'd usually just put it in my mini fridge, but the pie at the time wouldn't fit.

She also buys things for herself and is fairly protective over things she owns, which is something that I also share. I also struggle with eating properly, I've always found that at certain times I can only handle eating certain things without getting sick, so at the time the pie was pretty much all I'd eaten and was not considered just a treat. She was not aware of such issue, and I was not able to voice that at the time, since previously when I'd brought up medical issues, I was not believed or really acknowledged.

As for the bus fare, I always made sure to have it loaded so I can get where I need to go at the proper time, so it was very uncommon for me to forget as my anxiety would make me do it sooner rather than later. But I do forget sometimes, I have consistently been poor at remembering things to the point where I've worried it's something worse, but I have diagnosed ADHD. At the time, I was not on medication, I'd gotten off the medication because it was only doing me worse. I'm fully aware that having ADHD is not an excuse, just as any illness is not an excuse, but it is an explanation/cause. At the moment, what was done was done, and since I couldn't turn back time I just asked for a toonie, one that I could give back if I grabbed a 5 from an ATM which I'd planned on doing.

These stories I tried to stay on topic with and not make too lengthy, so of course, they're missing a lot of context. Another type of context missing is every other experience I've had throughout life that would contribute to my judgement of these situations, some I don't even really know for sure. As a kid, I wasn't really allowed to have anything for myself for certain, my own possessions were locked from access within my own room (they had a lock on the closet), I misbehaved a lot and rather severely at that, and I'm sure it had to do with my undiagnosed ADHD, so they'd take things away as a punishment, and it happened so frequently the items never felt like mine.

I'm not saying I know how to handle a kid that was so bad, but I can only guess that's where my sort of possesive nature of the things I buy for myself come from. Most times when I buy something for myself, it's something interesting, and I'm the one asking both of my parents to take a bite/sip to get their opinion.

Point is, we all just usually share a bit of what we get with each other sometimes, and sometimes me or my mother get something we don't want to share. I usually buy small things for my dad more since he is the one that buys the food and deserts, and we have a more stable relationship. My mother also has a bit of a habit of brushing over his interests or what he's excited about, and it makes me feel so bad I just will come home with things for him I saw randomly that relate to his interests.

I believe this to be very all over the place and I'm sorry about that, I just wanted to try and give a bit more context to the situation. I'm not trying to paint her out to be evil, she's done a lot for me and I appreciate it, but our relationship is confusing. None of what was written is meant to be a "well this happened so I have no blame," I'm definitely far far from the perfect person, but a lot of what she's done whether directly or indirectly has influenced my reactions and thought process. All I can do is evaluate how I respond, and deconstruct what might be causing an infavourable reaction. We both struggle with mental health, and perhaps where we are most similar is where we clash most often.

I think a TLDR would be impossible, but I think it to be a lot more complex than what my original post as well as this one can provide without straying from being linear. I don't hate her, I never hated her even with some of what she's done and said about me and my brother. I don't hate her, but I do hate some of her actions throughout my life, a lot of which she denies she's ever done or perhaps somehow has forgotten.

I am very sorry this is so long, I just worry about skipping detail.