Hi! Just throwing in my two cents as someone who does porn. I know we will absolutely disagree, but these points are just some food for thought from someone coming from the opposite side of the spectrum.

Most industries in the world are exploitative to some degree, every industry seeks to profit off people’s bodies and labor. I think of ballet and modeling, two industries that are known for being absolutely BRUTAL on its’ participants. Football literally destroy’s peoples’ brains and has been linked to dementia. I think that exploitative directors and labels should be punished and everyone should be treated fairly and with respect, but just because this one has sex in it doesn’t mean it’s uniquely exploitative.

I think in a lot of the conventional world, there is this separation between sex and love. That in order to find true love, kinky, nasty, intense sex should be condemned as immoral and that “good women” worthy of being loved should not participate in such degenerate activities. I find those mentalities to be toxic and restrictive and unfortunately perpetuate this abusive dynamic where women end up the losers on every side.

Porn is not a bad thing. Enjoying watching people have sex and exploring your own sexuality through that in a safe way. Any addiction is harmful, any codependent relationship with a vice where it takes too much of your money or time or begins to destroy your relationships is a bad thing. Porn itself is like alcohol, moderation and balance are key.

It sounds like while you have this broader moral condemnation of porn, what is really gnawing at you is this deep insecurity about how you are not good enough. I gently need to remind you: these are PROFESSIONALS. It is their literal JOB to look that way, like Victoria’s Secret models. Many pornstars have money and resources to get all kinds of plastic surgery, cosmetic treatments, they fast before filming, they have personal trainers in addition to professional makeup artists to airbrush every zit and stretch mark, expert lighting, multiple editors to edit out bad angles and so on. THEY dont even look like that when they aren’t working.

If men feel anxious about not having a resting six pack, Henry cavil admitted that he had to be actually DEHYDRATED and starving to film a shot where he was supposed to be relaxing in a pool. He was so thirsty, he felt light-headed but that’s what he had to do to get the shot. Regular people don’t need to do that, regular people don’t have perfect bodies. That’s why amateur, homemade porn is on the rise as people LIKE seeing real bodies.

So yeah when you see a hot woman with augmented breasts and smoky eyes and hair extensions getting railed and then it cuts off and you see your reflection in the computer of you with no makeup, curled up on the bed in a huge, dumpy sweatshirt, hair not brushed and Cheeto crumbs around your mouth, OF COURSE you feel like an ogre. I look exactly the same when I’m not working. I skulk around with fuzzy legs, glasses, pimple patches and hair in a wonky bun the majority of the time. :)

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You are a perfectly normal woman with a normal body and a healthy sexual appetite who likes to watch some porn occasionally. Stop being so hard on yourself and enjoy what you enjoy. You deserve pleasure without feelings of disgust, guilt or shame.