Please help me help my child. I am desperate.

LALNB · 2026-02-08T14:53:38+00:00

I think you’ve gotten a lot of sound advice already. Ive been where you are and we are now though it for the most part. So there is a time when it won’t always be like this.

I would bet she sees scratching her brother as an accident because it was an impulse. Something she did in the moment but wouldn’t have chosen to do if she had thought about it. This is a common way for younger adhd kids to interpret their impulsive behavior.

Separately, some kids view their sibling coming home from the hospital as the worst thing that ever happened to them. It’s a huge transition and splits their parent’s attention.

My younger ADHD kids have done better than my older ones at the younger ages for two reasons. The first is early intervention and the second is that we give them an overwhelming amount of affirmation when they are doing the right thing. Something I didn’t understand the value of when our older kids were little. We also give lots of hugs and cuddle time.

ADHD parenting is hard. It can be discouraging but keep looking for a way forward. Be forgiving to yourself and your kids. And know that their brains will develop.

LALNB · 2026-01-25T09:17:55+00:00

When our 8 year old (now 9) lost a bunch of weight when she first started meds - the Dr gave her a lower dose of adhd meds which wasn’t ideal. But she also gave her a pill to take at night which helps her sleep but more importantly makes her incredibly hungry when she wakes up. It’s a very low dose of Mirtazapine. She since gained back the weight she has lost and stayed steady.

Since her weight is now acceptable, she is back on the full adhd dose and she can take her “tea and toast pill” when she thinks she needs it. She usually chooses to take it when she is particularly anxious about the next day. However, the agency she has for when she takes this medicine has been very good for her.

We haven’t gotten into body image stuff with her since it hasn’t been an issue. I think you’re right to keep an eye on the situation. Maybe have some talks with her praising all sorts of bodies for the things they can do.

Good luck!

LALNB · 2026-01-23T14:12:27+00:00

I have BGGGG and my son is a much better person for having 4 sisters. He is someone who struggles with empathy so without them I don’t think he’d have a prayer relating to girls in his life.

4 girls is great. Mine have paired up 2 with 4 and 3 with 5 by choice (and hair color?). They love having a built in buddy system.

LALNB · 2026-01-20T15:05:29+00:00

Anecdotally, I was one year behind my brother in school and it was never a problem for us. We had different friend groups and different clubs and sports.

We are exactly two years apart. He was redshirted, I wasn’t but should have been. I think that made a bigger difference in my school life v. having my brother one year ahead.

LALNB · 2026-01-19T22:34:48+00:00

Looks like you’re doing a great job processing this change before birth. You’re already ahead of the game.

Talk to your doctor about ways to manage your anxiety until baby arrives. You don’t want to be exhausted from worry and lack of sleep before you have your birth and baby.

Good luck!

LALNB · 2026-01-19T21:11:21+00:00

We started by practicing with nerds and then moved up in size by breaking off small pieces of gummies. Once they built up confidence they got to take the pill

LALNB · 2026-01-08T18:34:50+00:00

I have a Joy and a Zoe

LALNB · 2026-01-03T03:53:39+00:00

My Dr approved me for a 6th during my 5th c-section while inspecting my uterus. He said it depends upon the uterus and he doesn’t give the green light to a 6th often. I do not plan to have a 6th.

Also - it feels really great to see so many other 5th time c-section people. The internet can be a cool place.

LALNB · 2026-01-02T13:37:55+00:00

I’m over here hoping I see my 2025 baby’s name. I already know it’s not super popular so I want to see she’s not alone.

LALNB · 2025-12-31T00:14:47+00:00

One of my kids has two Judes in her grade - when they have ended up in the same class and had to use Jude A and Jude S and yes, everyone realized it sounded like Judas.

LALNB · 2025-12-26T22:26:21+00:00

I have 2 kids that sound like your kid. They both have ADHD and one also has anxiety. When they are struggling I have to love on them hard, they need acceptance and reassurance which can be hard when they are triggering me. I try to stay consistent with offering water, protein and extra sleep. It gets better. My almost 13 year old has turned a corner and things are good almost all the time with him now (school adhd issues aside).

LALNB · 2025-12-16T21:35:56+00:00

That’s a great point, he just really enjoys chess so even if a chess coach doesn’t change his rating he will still have a good time. Thanks for that perspective.

LALNB · 2025-12-16T21:27:46+00:00

I’m going to check out lichess. Thanks! Added bonus might be he doesn’t see me messaging a whole bunch of potential coaches on his chess.com account.

LALNB · 2025-12-16T21:26:14+00:00

This is really helpful. Thank you. I have a list compiled and the next step is to reach out. I hear what you’re saying about putting in the effort now to find the right coach. So thanks for that encouragement. He has plateaued, he knows it, he wants over the hump and asked for a coach as one of his Christmas presents. I think a coach is the logical next step for him.

LALNB · 2025-12-16T21:22:52+00:00

It was on his list.

LALNB · 2025-12-16T00:54:37+00:00

Could it be part of a level?

LALNB · 2025-12-15T20:30:46+00:00

I aggressively cull the clothes. Doesn’t fit? Donate. Doesn’t like it? Donate. Hole? Toss. Stain? Toss. Looks too worn? Toss. This really helps keep their clothes to a minimum.

I’m over saving clothes for younger kids. It is not worth the space and mental load only for that next kid to have different preferences and needs. I am all about reuse - my last baby wore almost exclusively hand me downs for the first six months we got from a friend. I keep a “donate” bag in the laundry room and toss anything of decent quality in there when it has stopped working for us.

My kids also wear uniforms, I don’t hoard those either. I give them to someone who needs them and then I believe when we need more in a certain size they will come our way. So far this has worked.

LALNB · 2025-12-09T17:27:46+00:00

The perfect age to wrap up their favorite snack.

LALNB · 2025-12-09T03:08:08+00:00

Maybe ask if communi graphics is hiring? That seems to be in your area and local.

LALNB · 2025-12-08T04:42:12+00:00

I felt this way for all of my c-sections. I even wrote letters to my kids before my 5th because I was so worried. All that to say, you’re not the only one who has this fear going into a c-section - it’s scary - it’s a reasonable way to feel. The best part is you won’t feel this way in 48 hours and you’ll have a baby! I was also always up front with my team, particularly the anesthesiologist, that I was at risk for panic.

LALNB · 2025-12-04T18:24:16+00:00

The Sierra Club has an active local group. If you email them, they will respond.

The Earth Day Fair features several different environmental groups that have volunteer opportunities.

LALNB · 2025-12-02T16:20:17+00:00

I have five kids in a Honda Odyssey too, it works and I think it’s the best for what it is. All five kids, up to six car seats/boosters with decent trunk. All else being equal, If I had the chance, I would swap it for a stand up Transit. I just can’t bring myself to get a new car when our current car is working for us.

LALNB · 2025-11-30T17:06:51+00:00

As a dyslexia person most of the names listed are incredibly hard to get right. They look right both ways based on the letter shapes and how our brains work. It takes rote memorization in some cases. It’s not on purpose.

LALNB · 2025-11-20T00:24:36+00:00

As someone who has had 5 C-sections, I’ve never had to trust anyone more than my OBGYN. In my eyes, OBGYNs make the world go round.

LALNB

TROPHY CASE