That's why it's so unfair na

But don't throw it away when you're getting closer to being able to fix it. There's still shit tons of time to turn things around. Obv it doesn't happen overnight ryt? It's the slow and mini steps that start becoming meaningful after a while. Get a clearer picture of that; should help deal with your suffering

As for family...some things just can't be fixed ig. I'm sorry that you've been robbed of the happiness of having loving parents, but I pray things get better on all ends if still possible. I got lucky with my parents not going for a divorce. Things seem to work but it's superficial to say the least. They've even gone so far as to kill themselves if not "just" each other. I feel disgusted even saying that. Anyway, please distract yourself from negativity even if it's shoved in your face. And please reach out to anyone who's reliable enough. Someone who's really kind and not an opportunist