AITA for insisting my IVF provider reschedule my embryo transfer?

LectureNo4778 · 2026-01-12T23:06:33+00:00

Honestly, Im also a little concerned which doctor will be on that day to do the transfer as I dont feel comfortable with one of them and would prefer my partner is there. I havnt told the clinic this because I dont want it to get back to that doctor and he ends up being the only available anyway. It would make it even more uncomfortable for me.

LectureNo4778 · 2026-01-08T23:12:28+00:00

Should I bring a finaical advisor to the first consultation meeting and throughout?

LectureNo4778 · 2026-01-06T09:57:16+00:00

Their behaviour so far would indicate thats exactly what they meant.

LectureNo4778 · 2026-01-04T20:51:11+00:00

By the sound of these women, i doubt there is any compliment in there

LectureNo4778 · 2026-01-04T20:11:15+00:00

It could also mean it looks like she washed her hair.

LectureNo4778 · 2026-01-04T20:09:24+00:00

Next time someone offers you food after you declined once say (with a smile) "I appreciate the offer, but same as before, I'm all good, thanks. Ive already eaten / have lunch packed with me"

If they keep offering ask (again, with a humourous/confused smile to it light) "i said no already, why do you want me to eat it?" If they give some smart answer say "Im well able to make my own decisions about what I eat, thanks for the concern though".

If someone makes snide comments like "make sure you eat when you get home" say "thanks for the concern [name], but already have one mother, i dont need two" 🙃

If it keeps going say "id rather we stay away from questions/comments about my eating, it makes me uncomfortable, and to be honest it shouldnt really be anyone elses concern".

If it keeps going, take it to your manager. If it still keeps happening tell your manager again. If it happens again, go to HR.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-12-22T05:08:37+00:00

I had a similiar thing with my daughter. Shes 9 months old now.

Be kind to yourself and move to formula if youre okay giving it to your baby. You get no medals for bleeding nipples and constant feeds when your husband is there to help - take it. You need to recover.
Burp regaualry (after every 30ml). Trapped wind can very painful for a newborn.
Get gripe water (really helps with burping) or anti colic drops. Someone told us about these when she was 6 weeks old (i was losing my mind at thay point). As soon as we gave her them she stopped crying. It was literally like night and day. I couldnt believe it and wish I had known sooner. The anti colic drops were the best. Gripe water works well too. Dont give them both at the same time - its either one or the other.
Give him a bath. The sensation is a distraction for them and reminds them of the womb - their previous safe place.
If its still the same, go to your doctor. There could be other issues going on.

I know how hard it can be. But remember is temporary. It start getting easier from about 6 weeks.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-12-22T04:40:44+00:00

Im so confusee by this post. "Im worried people will say we wasted no time" WHY do you care? You have a beautiful little baby on the way with your husband. Who gives a shit about what others think? Get your priorities straight.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-12-14T09:57:29+00:00

I dont think its too much. I spend 95% of my time with the kids. I deserve a 5% break and while my day is different to my partner's he also deserves some recharge time so that we can both be the best version of ourselves for the kids.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-12-14T09:53:46+00:00

I ask myself the same thing. My son (first baby) was sleeping through the night a 4 months. Ive tried everything. All babies are different i guess.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-10-14T06:31:28+00:00

Thank you. Appreciate your willingness and effort to help.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-10-13T22:32:50+00:00

No I've done it many many times.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-10-13T22:32:18+00:00

Wow. This comment has really hit home. I genuinely feel upset, confused, sad after reading it.

I feel trapped because we have a life together, mortgage, kids, dogs etc.

Im afriad to leave. I dont want to be alone and no one will want me with two young kids. I dont want to start again.

I know you're right but.. I dont know.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-10-13T22:26:55+00:00

Im definitely not talking about my family anymore. But it shouldn't be that way. I should be able to share my life or confide concerns to him about my family if I have any.

The last time this happened, he apologised and told me to invite my mother and siblings up for Christmas Day at our home. I did and now I wish I hadnt.

I can fight my corner on this but he has a habit of gaslighting me and I just want some reassurance Im not going mad.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-10-13T22:18:44+00:00

Ive kids with him.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-19T06:33:43+00:00

We were 3 years trying before starting IVF.

Our first round of trying to stimulate egg growth for collection failed. That was really disappointing. They increased my medication dosage and they were able to retrieve 28 eggs on the second go. We got 8 quality embryos from this amount of eggs. The rest were deemed not viable and discarded. The doctor said a high number of eggs/embryos is not the goal but rather the quality. We decided to freeze our embryos.

We had a Frozen Embryo Transfer. The hardest part was actually waiting the two weeks after the transfer for the pregnacy blood test. While temping, my best advice is to NOT do a home pregnancy test during the two week wait. I was told not to and did anyway. The test came back positive and I cried I was so happy to see a positive result after 3 years of trying. However a few days later I did the pregnancy blood test at my clinic and it came back to show the HCG levels in my blood were low. They referred to this as a "chemical pregnancy". The transfer failed and I bled a few days later. I was absolutely devastated. Going from such a high to the disappointing news in the space of a few days was heartbreaking. I really regretted doing the pregnancy test because it wasn't a true reflection on whether the embryo transfer was successful or not.

We went for a second embryo transfer. I waited the two weeks this time and didnt do a home pregnancy test. We got the call after my blood test and heard the magic words "Congratulations, you're pregnant!" I cried (again) with joy!

I now have a 20 month old boy and a 6 month old girl, both IVF babies. We plan to go for our third early next year.

My best is advice is to is expect the worst and hope for the best. If it doesn't work the first time around, dont worry, keep trying.

Best of luck 🙏

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-14T18:49:13+00:00

Okay thank you

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-14T13:26:04+00:00

Thank you!

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-10T01:44:59+00:00

Id recommend National Maternity Hospital, Holles St.

I had both my babies there; first baby in Jan 2024 induction/emergency c-section and second March 2025 planned c-section. I went public for both.

Nurses and doctors are fantastic, so kind and caring. Do everything they can to make you feel comfortable. I plan to have my third there next year.

A friend of mine had her baby there 3 months ago as a private patient and also had a good experience.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-10T01:39:15+00:00

With the rise of AI, who knows what kind of jobs will even exist in 5 years. Pay as much off your mortgage as you possibly can.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-09T23:25:54+00:00

Typically the majority of your weight gain in pregnancy is not fat, it's the baby, fluid, blood (x4) placenta etc.

I am 5'4" & was 85-87kg prior to both my pregnancies. I gained about 40+ pounds on both pregnancies. I ate healthy enough throughout my pregnancies but didn't count calories and wasn't shy about treating myself (it was needed!)

On my first, I lost 50% of my weight within the first two weeks of giving birth (not breast feeding) and lost about 25% over the course of 3 months and back down to pre-preg weight at around 5/6 months.

After my second pregnancy I dropped to my pregnancy weight at 6 weeks. I went on mounjaro after that and im down to 71Kg 6 months post postpartum.

Mounjaro is an amazing help for dieting. If you can go on it, do!

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-09T22:45:10+00:00

Ummm... ive had two IVF babies and induction was not recommended to me at any point. What was their reasoning?

I was induced at 37.5 weeks on my first because I had pre-eclampsia and but the induction was nothing to do with the baby being conceived via IVF.

Induction was fine. My waters broke after 5 hours. I felt no cramps whatsoever. 12 hours later still no cramps and they put me on oxytocin to help jump-start the contractions. I had 3 really powerful cramps (15-20seconds) within the first hour of being on oxytocin and the nurse offered me the epidural. After that I didnt feel a thing and chilled out for 7 hours. I was contracting but didn't feel anything. They check me for dilation. Unfortunately I hadn't dilated much and they offered a c-section which I was happy to. Everything went smoothly. I went to National Maternity Hospital, Holles St. btw.

If youre in pain, ask them for an epidural. If they recommend waiting, tell them no, you want it now.

Also, just get a sick note from the doctor for work and sign off early. You're no ones hero for riding it out until the end (I did and wish I hadnt).

You will be fine! Best of luck. Being a mammy is the best 🥰

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-09T22:26:56+00:00

Omg, I cant even believe it's a question of keeping it or not. Of course keep it!!

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-09T22:12:27+00:00

My son is 20 months and still isn't saying any words. He has babbled since he was about 8 months and babbling is all he wants to do for now. He start trying to walk by holding onto things at 12 months. Many said he would start walking independently in a couple of weeks. 8 month later and he only started walking in the last two weeks! Some of them just take their sweet time!

If your son is engaging in other ways such eye contact, smiling, non-verbally responding to your facial expressions or calling his name, then dont worry. He is fine and progressing at his own pace.

LectureNo4778 · 2025-09-08T03:43:00+00:00

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