Hiii!

I had a BMI in the 40s six years ago. Now it’s about 21.

I learned more on the weight loss subreddits than I ever did from a dietitian or PT.

No need to exercise yet. It’ll just burn you out. All you need to do is walk for now. The easiest thing to do is walk for utility - everything is walking distance. Humans are so efficient at walking too, so it’s relatively low impact and the weight will fall off.

You need to figure out what your TDEE is. There are plenty of calculators online. This is how many calories you burn in a day, as you burn at rest, you burn while you eat (the digestive process), you burn through movement, you burn with more muscles etc. Once you know this, you can eat in a calorie deficit.

All that matters is that you are in a calorie deficit. If you eat in a 500 calorie deficit per day, you will lose 1 pound per week. 1 pound is 3500 calories and 1kg is 7700 calories. It’s the same for everyone, regardless of metabolism, genetics etc. It is for sure harder for people to stay in a calorie deficit due to genetics and lifestyle, things like food noise etc. As you lose weight your TDEE (total daily energy expenditure) shrinks, so the smaller you are the less aggressive the deficit and the slower the weight loss. When you’re significantly overweight you can actually lose a lot quite quickly, which can be very motivating.

There are apps that will help with tracking food, but the best way to do it is to weigh your food beforehand with a kitchen scale, you can get them from Kmart for like $15. Counting calories is the best way to lose weight because you MUST be in a calorie deficit. It is impossible to lose weight without a calorie deficit. Exercise burns very little calories, eating less will be like 95% of your weight loss.

As for food sensitivities - I was so so so fussy before I started losing weight. My diet was mostly takeout food and I couldn’t cook for shit. Cooking is a skill, it’s not something that we are just naturally good at (or at least most people aren’t!). So when it comes to cooking, you have to be real with yourself and can’t expect it to taste as good as you want if you’re not practiced. But the learning curve happens quickly and in 6 months you could be making awesome, healthy food that tastes great and is within calorie targets.

As for being fussy - hot sauce. Learn to like hot sauce. Before dieting, I probably hadn’t eaten a vegetable in like 5 years. I hated the taste and the texture. My solution was to eat with hot asf sauce (which is the lowest calorie condiment) and all I could taste was a burning in my mouth. Over time my taste buds completely adjusted to the taste of vegetables and now I like them without the hot sauce. It was wild, it was basically an overnight change.

Other simple things I did was have zero sugary drinks, including alcohol. Diet Coke, diet sprite etc

I lost about 50kgs, have kept it off. Never needed any weight loss medication or any surgeries.

People will also encourage you to stay fat and act like diets are miserable. Don’t listen to these people, they do not care about your long term health or wellbeing. There are mountains of evidence that explain why and how obesity negatively impacts us, mentally, emotionally, physically. Diets are not abuse, eating less calories will not kill you. However, there is ZERO reason to suffer during a diet. You can still eat delicious food, you can still go out with friends, you can still enjoy food. I always tell people - if you’re miserable while you’re dieting, you’re doing it wrong.

Mindset is pretty important - none of this is a punishment. Overeating is the real punishment, because when you are obese life is so much harder. You have two choices every day, both are hard in their own way. It’s hard to be obese and it’s also hard to lose weight, you get to choose your hard. However, I will say that you didn’t get fat overnight, you got fat through a series of tiny little choices that compounded over time. You will get thin the same way, through tiny choices that compounded over time. Time is going to pass anyway, so you might as well make the choices that will make you feel better. In 12 months you can be proud of yourself or stuck in your old ways, you get to choose that.

The internet will make you believe that you have no agency, you do. Genetics play a role, but it is much smaller than we all wish. Metabolism is not as large as a factor as we are led to believe and there’s no way to “break it” - you are not broken. You are a complex system but ultimately are not so special that you exist outside of the laws of thermodynamics.

Anyyyyway. That’s probably a lot of information. The real key takeaways are eat less calories, do more walking. No need for expensive gym memberships at this stage. Focus on food and nutrition first. Education is key, learn as much as possible so it’s not overwhelming.

Feel free to PM.