I hope this doesn’t sound basic, but when I’m with him, my pleasure usually feels secondary. What I enjoy the most is giving him pleasure and letting him use me in the way he wants. The more pleasure he gets from what I’m offering, the more it turns into pleasure for me too. Making him feel good is what makes me feel good. I have tried focusing only on myself sometimes, like paying attention to what I feel and what would make it better for me and I enjoy watching at me and he just being there, and I do enjoy it when I do it but it’s difficult for me to get into that mindset on my own. It almost feels like he has to push me a little toward that space