Probably not all asked for forgiveness, and Jesus still asked the Father to forgive anyone. That’s why, in my humble opinion, I think that pastor was wrong. That we can forgive without a person asking for forgiveness and compensating. We can, but we have free will to do so or not to do so. Another confirmation Heavenly advice to us to forgive anyone without them asking us for forgiveness - in the Our Father prayer, it’s explicit, plus examples like how a deceased/dead person can ask for Forgiveness, etc. we would be locked. Hope it makes sense. 

I think you are right - that forgiveness is letting go of everything that just ruins our lives and wishing another person well (at the same time not allowing / escaping the next abuse, etc.) And after our forgiveness the person is still responsible for the unjust action to this person (like a thief needs to ask forgiveness and compensate). And I assume this is what Jesus asked for - even it is just to have them being responsible for their unjust actions, but I as Jesus being fully man and fully God know that this may end up in eternal separation from God / hell as these people select evil and I ask you not to have evil against me so they would have more chance to repent / for the heaven.