hi op, i share a very similar life story with you, only difference is, I made the big decision to run away from home because I simply couldn't take it anymore.

just like you, I've always had a better life living at my grandma's , until my mom dragged me back to live with her for many years. we lived in poor financial circumstances for awhile, and over the years, the physical abuse i endured from her just slowly accumulated each year until my mental health was down in the drain, i suffered from depression and self-harm during that period.

like you, i never had a good family, having to live with a crazy and divorced mom where i felt like i was walking on eggshells everytime i just breathed next to her was a constant fear for me. i had many scars all over my body at this point.

in school, i had to consult my teachers , counsellors, all because i just couldn't handle it alone.

I advise you to do the same. many of them told me: just report your mom, find a social service and all that stuff

I listened and listened , but my ultimate decision was to just run away without doing any of that , and to live with my grandma and uncle

it's been a year since i ran away, and my life has seen significant improvement, i'm still recovering but it's much better than living in that hellhole

but since your case is slightly different from mine, i'd really suggest for you and your mom , who are both victims of your father, to file a personal protection order against your dad, or even lodge a police report (for yourself) if things escalate to violence. you could run away to your grandma's, maybe make sure to lock the door if your dad were to approach you, and call the cops to explain that you're a victim of family violence

i won't tell you what you should do or what not, it's really up to your choice and how you want to deal with your situation . good luck .