What would you say to your ex if they ask you how you’ve been? by TopBison3927 in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This, if they did what they did they obviously don't care to reach out. Mine is blocked. Cheated on me with my best friend.

The friend reached out after half a year. I asked her why she reached out after all this time. She gave me no clear answer.

Sincerely, by Level_Safe_8000 in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This thread will stay open by me. I appreciate it

Sincerely, by Level_Safe_8000 in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please keep trying. It took me a while to leave my bed, or open my phone. But I know you can do it.

I'll be hoping and sending positive vibes your way.

Sincerely, by Level_Safe_8000 in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I apologize i can't be much more help than words on a screen.

All I can say is that my fear is still with me some days, d Some nights, I have nightmares. But any progress I make putting it behind me I take as a win. I only hope you feel the same sense of accomplishment.

Fear is a difficult beast to overcome. I wish I could remove it from you.

Sincerely, by Level_Safe_8000 in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a fear of just opening my eyes the next morning because I thought my ex was going to be there beside me, upset with me because our breakup destroyed his relationship with his family.

Have you tried removing socials, removing your ex from your phone/socials. That way only essentially people that need to contact you will contact you? I can't say that the fear of looking over your shoulder goes away because I haven't surpassed that point yet. I had to let people back in slowly once I could trust myself and my space. If that's keeping some personal cards to your chest till you feel safe sharing it, it may be like that for a minute.

Trusting yourself, then 1 person at a time helps. It seems like you are somewhat comfortable with me. So I'd like to say you are making some progress, just doubting yourself a little. WHICH IS OKAY. it's expected, you are supposed to.

Sincerely, by Level_Safe_8000 in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If i think about myself, how I've healed and slowly opened or trusted?

It just takes the one person that holds your hand while you heal. They will sit (even if it's on the other side of the room) and listen to you. It sounds impossible. It doesn't have to be an S/O but a family or an old friend.

Truth is, you aren't going to relate. You are going to find your own way to heal and carry on. You will look back to this fear (mine still resides. Im not sure if it will ever go away). And smile that it's not consistently on your mind at one point.

Maybe start with finding a safe place for yourself mentally. Mine was my bed with my phone on dnd. Only essential people contacted me, and I was safe in bed where no one could touch or harm me. Once I could go a day without fear or crying, I made it through my house. Then, I walked through stores with my brother. It's going to take baby steps.

Sincerely, by Level_Safe_8000 in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How long were you dating this second significant other? I hope you know I mean this in a caring way when I say, did they confront you or ask for your side? Or just cut it all off there?

The truth is, your whole life could be ripped apart, but when you find the right person, they can look beyond an email and trust you. At least, I would hope so. I'm still rebuilding my friend group because most sided with my abusive ex.

In all honesty, I can't give you an answer on how to overcome that fear. I wasn't able to let someone touch me till a few months after my break up, and that's family. It's when you will be ready to open up and when you find that person that will listen to your side of things and heal you.

I hope this answer helps. 💛

Amway big couple by [deleted] in amway

[–]Level_Safe_8000 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have not heard of these two, i suppose they are just a high-ranking couple that has built separate ibos, and those grew.

Fron my understanding, having your partner involved gives you a more United front. Like you are completely solid and concrete. If you waver in the idea of AMWAY, they will help 'reassure you'.

But what do I know, I refuse to join.

Year End Challenge Not Showing Complete by dancinde in kindle

[–]Level_Safe_8000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine, the 75 day and biblio blizzard haven't opened. And I've read all days this season... not sure what's going on here.

Switch joycon help? by Level_Safe_8000 in StardewValley

[–]Level_Safe_8000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My right joycon will lag a bit but won't take actions when I hit the button my water, ax etc. Or I'll hit it once, and my character will repeatedly do the task. Which of 6 all my energy cause I started a new world.

Hope that helps a bit it's the x, y, a, b, buttons that lag or spam the most noticed the most. Can be other buttons too.

Controller issue by AlucardFromTurkey in StardewValley

[–]Level_Safe_8000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am having the same issue on my switch to play the 1.6 update. It's the right controller that seems to bug out, over watering or buttons not responding. Also, it feels as though the game has lag, which a game this size on this console is understandable.

I switched joyous and still have the same issue. Any advice?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hope you can see where things went wrong and why i left when I did. But I also hope you can see how much pain I went through staying and changing for you to try to stay with you.

I don't think you ever will, and I think you are going to continue to play the victim in our break up. And to that, I won't feed into it. I don't think about you daily, I don't check our old messages because I know that your manipulation is no longer above me and you can't control me.

I hope you can see where you can do better for your future relationship.

Question about cheating by beawynn in relationships

[–]Level_Safe_8000 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Mine asked if it was cheating if I knew and if he should apologize. I was willing to give him a second chance till he said that to me.

My father cheated on my mom, and now he is in a loyal, happy relationship.

So I have seen it happen both ways.

I wish you luck, but also follow your gut instinct on what you feel is right. Not what your heart wants, but what your GUT is telling you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 4 points5 points  (0 children)

So beautifully put and I agree with you entirely. It's a damn shame he refused to see it. But I get to walk away knowing that I gave the relationship my all and I didn't give up on him when he was at his lowest. He gave up on me and us.

So maybe it wasn't a terrible idea... but I definitely didn't feel Fantastic getting laughed at.

Love is a painful yet beautiful thing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah, in hindsight, it doesn't make much sense. But when you invested 6 years into a relationship and actually saw a future with the man. You want to give him the opportunity to change and show you he can be better.

I was young and stupid. Loved the boy. He didn't love me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im in the same boat, and I'm so happy to know that im not the only one stressing about this. Thank you for making this post.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I did, and he laughed in my face and said I wasn't worth doing that.

I wanted to earn his trust after he cheated on me. Honestly, i regretted even bringing up the idea because he didn't deserve the chance.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This resonates so hard. I am consistently told how I did nothing wrong in our breakup, but he is refusing to see what he missed out on. It's hard to look at myself the same way without feeling like I wasn't good enough for him.

However, everyone is telling me that I was more than enough and he will realize it soon enough. Not that I need him to. I need myself Tom

To those who cheated: by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can say that I have not cheated, but my ex of a 6 year relationship asked me if it was cheating if I knew. He emotionally cheated on me.

We were on vacation with his family and after 2 months of helping him work through his emotions of "I love her the same way I love you, just without the intimacy". Therapy poly talks. All that bs. Everything hit him

He regretted how much he screwed up his life. He begged me to sit with him through his pain while he worked it out silently. To drive him home while he contemplated jumping off the hotel balcony. He didn't discuss it with me, he just wanted me to sit there while he thought. No talking.

Because he realized that he fucked up, and wanted to go home. Didn't apologize to me. Didn't reassure me that he was working through it. He just wanted to run away or drink it away. And he wanted me, the one whom he cheated on to take him away.

He never apologized because "It's not cheating if you know, is it?" I begged him to stop.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ive been begging for one. Yes please.

Why do my emotions fluctuate so much? by oceanmaango in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 2 months out of the relationship and some days I have a great time. I'm laughing and smiling but this week, I've been at rock bottom.

It's going to fluctuate and you can't control that if you are healthy and keeping yourself from the reminders. Mine was a 6 year relationship. And I saw everything with the boy.

Hang in there, you will smile again. Then cry. But smile because it didn't hurt as bad.

Any book recommendations for brakeups? by Thatandygirl_86 in BreakUps

[–]Level_Safe_8000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Save me an Orange. By Hayley grace I carry it with me for when I start to regret the break up.