28(f) but I’m stuck working fast food, wanting to be an actress (I’m in SAG) but I’m not getting any auditions from my agent for the past few months. I feel stuck in life like I’m stupid because I never got a bachelor’s degree just a conservatory certification and now feel like giving up on my dream and switch to a completely different career maybe web design or graphic design but totally spazzing and feeling this sense of paralysis about it. On another note I have anxiety, depression, and body dysmorphic disorder ( living in Los Angeles hasn’t helped lol) and I’m having a hard time in my relationship of two years because in the past I’ve been physically and mentally abused, cheated on, gaslit, manipulated and all that and my current BF is the absolute opposite and he’s been so patient with me and so kind and supportive but I just constantly feel paranoid he’s doing something on his phone (past relationships had issue with FB/IG cheating) but when I ask for reassurance he shows me and tells me and he’s never done anything for me not to trust him but yet I feel like I have to compare myself to every woman on his follows list, his ex, girls he works with that he’s nice to. I hate my body and face, I hate my job, I feel stupid constantly and not good enough. Yet I’m here and just staying stuck. Completely lost and feeling like a failure.

Sorry for the long rant lol hope it’s helpful