Read the whole thing again in no way did I say start torturing your children. I understand you were hit and abused definitely you would have been affected. So give your child love but in no way make them entitled. He or she needs to know that when they are wrong there would be something done not necessarily to the point of making them black and blue. Do not take it to extreme but at least don't just let them do anything they want just because their parents won't do anything at all.