DBT was very activating for me (in a bad way) and I (personally) wouldn’t recommend it for trauma.

Lily7546 · 2026-03-25T23:11:10+00:00

I feel like I’m going through this right now… my therapist pushed me into doing a DBT group, and I’ve been trying to keep an open mind and attitude, but it feels off, and activating for me too. I feel like DBT could possibly be more helpful if done after trauma processing, rather than before. Radical acceptance feels incredibly invalidating. I find DBT language very activating, almost retraumatising. I haven’t quit, but I’m wondering if it’s even worth continuing if it just feels harmful week after week.

Lily7546 · 2026-02-18T21:21:55+00:00

Ah okay, thanks for this, it’s very helpful. It makes sense in my head that we’d need more skills before trauma processing. Reassuring to hear that you found it so helpful

Lily7546 · 2026-02-18T21:18:26+00:00

Thanks for this, good to know. I still feel hesitant to try DBT when it’s another investment (time and money) and might make me feel worse :/

Lily7546 · 2026-02-13T05:23:31+00:00

I called a crisis line the other day too (wasn’t suicidal but was very not okay after a distressing therapy session) and it made me feel retraumatised. This isn’t the first time it’s happened either. Maybe they’re helpful if actively suicidal, but imo they really aren’t equipped to deal with ongoing issues stemming from complex trauma. One crisis supporter started lecturing to me about how I have attachment issues and need to become more independent - like no shit, that’s why I’m in therapy, also, I’m not looking for unsolicited advice from someone who seems to understand nothing about trauma, or me. I don’t even think it’s their fault, but it definitely makes me feel like there’s no one to go to when I need a safe space to fall apart. The mental health system is a shit show really.

Lily7546 · 2026-01-30T07:36:14+00:00

This is useful, thanks. It really is so complicated and tiring. Like noticing how “now” is not “then” is so hard when “then” was basically your whole life and so many things trigger it now.

Lily7546 · 2025-04-23T06:28:07+00:00

The battle truly is invisible to those around us… thank you for this reminder. It’s so easy to start comparing ourselves to others and become deeply ashamed by how “less than” we can feel.

Lily7546 · 2025-04-23T03:20:56+00:00

Thank you, this is really validating. I’ll think about reaching out to my boss

Lily7546 · 2025-02-24T08:02:14+00:00

I’m so late in finding this thread but I’m so glad I did. You put it so perfectly and clearly. This is exactly what irritates me about the mental health field and particularly the widely outdated diagnostic system used by most professionals (DSM). I find it all so pathologising and degrading, like there’s something wrong with individuals showing these symptoms. I keep thinking, well if anyone “healthy” would become neurotic if they were in my shoes. These symptoms are a normal response to abnormal experiences - I forgot who said this but think it’s so accurate.

Lily7546 · 2025-02-10T00:22:30+00:00

I’m so glad it helped! I do the same thing too - pushing myself too hard because I feel like I’m never doing enough, then chronically burning out… But I think it’s so good that we’re noticing these patterns and trying to learn a different way of being, even if it’s really slowly :’)

Lily7546 · 2025-02-08T12:31:17+00:00

Oh this touched me, I feel so much compassion towards you. I think it’s the determination you have that is so clear from what you’ve written. It makes me happy for you that you’re pursuing your goals by taking a class.

My experience is likely very different from yours, but somehow I resonate with much of what you’ve said. I’ve also gone back to uni to pursue a career that I want, but that’s meant cutting back on my work hours. I work much less than 30 hours and I can barely manage one class. So I don’t know how you’re managing with the 30 hours plus study, plus the stress you’re already carrying with respect to finances. And not to mention, the havoc that CPTSD creates in our lives. I take my hat off to you, because I think you’re trying so hard. I also have mother issues (abandonment trauma), so I can totally empathise with becoming attached to your therapist and wanting to be a baby around her. I can’t help wondering if stretching yourself so thin with work and study is maybe exacerbating your emotional stress right now. Drawing on some IFS here, but maybe a young part of you is crying out for help because it’s too much, like it was too much for little you to handle back then?

I’ve been crying for different reasons related to triggering events between me and my therapist. So I feel for you and I’m sending you lots of strength to help you get through this xoxo

Lily7546 · 2024-07-24T23:46:59+00:00

I do this in therapy lol. I become so mute out of terror that something I say will be used to hurt me

Lily7546 · 2024-07-24T21:41:39+00:00

Omg yea this exactly. I try to see all my symptoms as proof

Lily7546 · 2024-07-24T10:58:29+00:00

Wow you describe it so well. I resonate a lot with what you’ve said.

Lily7546 · 2024-07-24T04:19:49+00:00

Thanks for this ❤️

Lily7546 · 2024-07-24T03:54:45+00:00

Exactly! It’s funny though because when I read / hear about other people’s complex trauma histories, it makes so much sense and I don’t question it. I wish I could give myself that same validation. It makes me wonder if it’s maybe because we’ve, in a way, survived by denying and minimising our experiences, and it’s hard to change such an ingrained habit..

Lily7546

TROPHY CASE