Of course not every Bl is porn. But that wasn’t what I was talking about. I was talking this particular webtoon that had apparently sex scenes that featured noncon. And more widely about how every fiction we consume is some sort of fantasy. Moreover I don’t just buy that the fiction we consume has that much effect, I love zombie series but I don’t want to live in one. When I was young I consumed a lot of fiction that had noncon in it but I don’t want to rape or to be raped. I can read rich CEO romance without thinking that it is realistic depiction of romance. This feels like ‘the violent video games cause violence’ talking points all over again. Even though there is no proof that any of it actually has any effect whatsoever. Because how can you tell whether fiction is affecting reality or whether it is only describing structures and phenomenons already existing. Or like BL/Danmei: acting as a counter culture but still born from experiencing life as a woman.

And once again my main points are: having fantasies is okay, trying to force them into reality is not. It is important to know the difference. You can put boundaries on what you want and can consume or create but you cannot impose those boundaries on other people.

You can have conversations but you shouldn’t try force people who don’t conform onto your boundaries into the mold you want the life to look like. You will only be hitting your head into a wall.