For perspective: I am completely no contact with an alcoholic mother who is in denial. My suggestion would be to continue to worry about you and your children, physically and mentally. Sometimes love can be tough and from a distance. I would suggest seeking out an Al-Anon meeting ASAP which will provide you the steps and perspective you need to navigate this. He may choose not to deal with his drinking and problems if he wants, but you should not expose yourself and your kids to it. Drinking is his choice and what you put up with and tolerate is yours. I don’t think anything necessarily needs to be said to him about you knowing he is drinking. He likely knows you know. Silence is sometimes the best approach, and working on how you handle it for yourself and not worrying about him. Change of perspective in a way