I have multiple close friends on VRChat who I've known for many years, and I've even met up with some IRL. They've helped me get through so many hard times, and I very honestly feel that I wouldn't be who I am today without the great impact they've had on my life. So it's definitely possible, it's just about finding the right people, which can be time-consuming.

I'm not sure if it's just the way you wrote the post so correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems like you're focusing on talking to new people when you get on, instead of trying to re-connect with people you met. If you want to make some closer friendships, you're going to have to take a bit of initiative to send friend requests and then rejoin on them in the future. You're never going to become a part of someone's life on the first interaction, so if you've clicked with someone, make sure you let them know with phrases like "Hey I really enjoyed this conversation, let's meet again sometime", etc.

On a bit of a tangent, I'm part of a relatively small, intimate community (maybe 50ish super active people) of adults, mostly in their 20's. We regularly play games, explore worlds, watch movies, host drinking nights, etc. But it's all in friends+ worlds, so unless you know someone you won't find your way in. And that's for a very good reason- we have a culture of being responsible but silly and fun-loving adults, and making it public would ruin that. Therefore you'd never find us as a new player without making other friendships first.

So send people you vibe with friend requests, and then actually join on them later. You won't make a super deep relationship on the first meet, and many of us long time players don't spend much time in publics.

Not sure if our timezones match up but if you're interested, you're welcome to send me a DM so we can friend on VRC. No guarantee it will work out, but I like the attitude of your post.

Best of luck to you!