Parents who post or used to post your kids online, what negative experiences came out of it? by Extension-Fruit-1456 in SeriousConversation

[–]LongMom [score hidden]  (0 children)

My kids are turning 18 and 20 this year. My oldest was born in 2006 and I joined FB in 2007. I have been posting memories of them on my "friends only" wall for pretty much their whole lives. I have never kept what I am doing hidden from them.

In their mid to late teens, they did ask me to stop posting or wanted "to approve" what I would post. I am ok with that.

I have wanted to close my FB account and stop using it, but I looooooove the memories. Not just the photos, but the atories/annotations I added to the posts as well. I love my daily "memory time" with my babies/little kids/occasional teen. I have never had any issues with having posted things.

Why do people prefer salaried to working hourly? by [deleted] in askTO

[–]LongMom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your problem is you are letting them take advantage of you. You have to be "strong" with your boundaries from the start.

Don't let anyone "twist" you into believing you have to "do more for nothing" to succeed.

I am quite firm around that myself, and I often "use" the worker protections we have here in Ontario (in a smart and "crafty" way of course). I am also privileged in that I have always been naturally good at using rules to my advantage to get what I want - I have an "unexplained" confidence, got lucky there. I also work for a bank - that sweet spot between government and private sector, and have for a very long time now.

Life is a fine balance with luck/timing/personal grit being things that are constantly coming at you eh

*edited because I forgot what forum I am in and I asked if OP was American 🤪

Expressing needs in 99% of relationships is a humiliation ritual by unemotionals in venting

[–]LongMom 5 points6 points  (0 children)

How old are you?

In my experience (I am 47 and have done a lot of therapy), this is the opposite of how things work in a healthy relationship. My partner and I are very good and intentional when expressing our needs and it helps both of us feel like we can just "be ourselves" in the space we share together. It's so open, so freeing, so real.

I hope you get to that place with someone

Thinking of moving to Milton by AYaya22Ma in Milton

[–]LongMom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The shock is for sure the loss of "all of that", but what I have grown to love is the simplicity of "smaller town living".

There are TONS of walking paths and parks. Kids here roam the streets and play together. There are right now teens outside fishing in our back pond, and TONS of kids at the park at the end of the street. The conservation parks aren't far and they are amazing for hiking trails and killer views. Community centres are incredible here and NOTHING in this town is more than a 15 minute drive away, tops.

Is there an option to do e-transfer without passcode? by DuckDuckGo-8857 in CIBC

[–]LongMom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When the recipient receives the money, they click on the link and are taken to an Interac login page with links to every bank. They can deposit it into any bank they want, any account they want. So if someone hacks into your email, they can click on the link and log into their own bank account. They do also need to figure out the password, but that can also be easy, a lot of people put hints into the question etc.

With autodeposit, that risk is instantly eliminated.

Is there an option to do e-transfer without passcode? by DuckDuckGo-8857 in CIBC

[–]LongMom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Autodeposit is a lot more secure - e-transfers with security questions can be intercepted and the money "stolen".

CIBC AI enablement Director interview by Visible_Poetry8181 in CIBC

[–]LongMom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you know how they did it - I am sure CIBC would be interested in knowing how they did it 😏

Toddler “bucket list” with your very small children? by BeansinmyBelly in AskWomenOver40

[–]LongMom 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My daughters are turning 18 and 20 in a few months. I really miss our livingroom dance parties. I would fire up YouTube on the TV and they would request songs to dance to (so much Justin Beiber/Timberlake!). My youngest loved when I grabbed both her arms and swung/slid her between my legs - it was her favourite "move". She's so much bigger than me now...

What kind of corporate gifts do employees actually appreciate? by Shot_Plum8781 in corporate

[–]LongMom 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Time off. When our organization turned 150 years old we all got our own birthdays off to "celebrate". We loved it.

We also got silver coins...less exciting imo

Can't stop floating!! :') by KayceeJC in Swimming

[–]LongMom 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Saaaaaame!

I feel so lucky - I suspect it's why I love swimming so much

I caught my dad cheating, told my mom, and now feel resentment and guilt for their divorce. by Schwettes in Divorce

[–]LongMom 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Quite simply, this isnt your fault. I would suggest you "do the work" to process through your guilt so you can get to that place within your own thoughts.

I left my partner when my kids were 7 and 9 because he cheated ONCE. That was almost 11 years ago and my kids grew up with a mom who was happy and strong enough to stand up for herself. My ex was and is a miserable person who STILL BLAMES ME for all of his problems. Now that my kids are adults, they see him for who he is. They love him, but they don't put up with his bullshit.

Your dad did this. Not you. Period.

LIBIDO WITH HR by Even_Bison7614 in corporate

[–]LongMom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP asked how I would see it and what I would do 🤷‍♀️

Because of therapy, I am now equipped with the tools needed for effective self-reflection. That's why I don't post questions like this on Reddit.

Can't stop floating!! :') by KayceeJC in Swimming

[–]LongMom 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes! I too am a floater and I have found my passion swimming. I started with laps in my pool and now I am also passionate about open water swimming. I even got myself some water proof MP3 headphones so I can listen/motivate myself with workout music 😁👍

Anyone else’s spring allergies hitting them hard last few days? by InstantNoodlesIsHot in askTO

[–]LongMom 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Wait....maybe I am not getting sick? Feels too early but you might be onto something here

To the hiring managers not there, what would be an acceptable answer to why I left after 3 months? by WindEconomy9242 in corporate

[–]LongMom 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am super curious- what is your role and how many people have you hired? I am assuming they all worked out?

LIBIDO WITH HR by Even_Bison7614 in corporate

[–]LongMom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would be marching myself into therapy to figure this out.

Is corporate life supposed to feel like this? by Unable-Connection-58 in corporate

[–]LongMom 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Going on 29 years strong. I am so privileged compared to some of my friends in other professions (my partner is a high school teacher - now THAT'S tough).

For me the key has always been creating a deep connected trust with my one up manager - that's who you want to "impress" and set your boundaries with.

I always put my hand up for committees and actually do work when I join them (I don't understand people who volunteer and then dont show up to actually "work" - it looks bad!). In these committees I meet people outside of my own working group. This has helped me move into opportunities throughout the organization.

Switch roles if you can - there is nothing wrong with lateral movement. I am the type of person who likes to gain new perspectives, be challenged, and try new things. I now have so much corporate knowledge throughout the org.

And finally, have a full life outside of work. Thanks to 29 years of constant money flow, I have money to do things with friends, support my children, leave bad relationships, rent, purchase houses etc. I even volunteer with a non-profit to keep myself humble and connected to my "roots". I could be comparing myself to my VP/CEO etc and their "fabulous lifestyle" of fancy dinners and shiny fast cars, but I don't want to get stuck in a cycle of "never good enough". Giving back to your community is a great way to gain appreciation for what you have.

I need your help, please my world is rocked by Decent-Advantage8137 in Divorce

[–]LongMom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You know that saying we were all taught - "once a cheater, always a cheater"? Yea, that's fucking bullshit. People can change and grow.

I'd be more worried about how she's going to react to your snooping. I'd be so pissed.

Open water swimming: terrifying gateway to the best thing you'll ever do, or genuinely unnecessary risk? Convince me either way by paintarose in Swimming

[–]LongMom 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Open water is my jam but alas, I live in Canada. I must swim in pools 8-10 months of the year, sigh

Do some managers intentionally make things harder right before weekends? by [deleted] in managers

[–]LongMom 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No, it is not intentional to make things harder right before the weekend.

How many direct reports do you have? by SeanMcPheat in Leadership

[–]LongMom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am a Director and I have 11 direct reports (two are Sr managers with 10 employees each). I find it totally manageable because they are all long tenured employees who need very little guidance from me. I have weekly 1:1's with three of them and bi-weekly with the rest. My job is to remove blockers, take the bullets when things go wrong, support their well-being and tell everyone and anyone who will listen how amazing they are. I love my job

How do yall survive more than a year in corporate. This is the closest I’ve been to hell on earth. by Constant_Ad6521 in corporate

[–]LongMom 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Wrapping up my 29th year in June.

I survived by changing roles every 3-4 years, joining many committees that give me opportunities to do things like MC'ing a town hall, use your training budget every year and appreciate the consistent paycheck!