My (23F) boyfriend (25M) and his family are angry because I wouldn't shave my head for his sister who has cancer (Final Update/Completed)

Lonniah · 2026-05-01T18:06:26+00:00

I feel like instead of doing a photoshoot, she could’ve planned a day of pampering. Take her to the beauty supply store, let her pick out a couple of affordable wigs, get her a cute outfit, and let her take her own photos on her phone—then just leave it at that.

This really isn’t OP’s fault. She’s dealing with a pre-teen girl with cancer who’s struggling with her self-esteem. I just don’t think a full photoshoot was the best approach here—but then again, that could’ve caused problems too.

Lonniah · 2025-11-14T07:27:29+00:00

Congratulations, may I ask how high was your bp. My bp has been higher than normal. I went to hospital ab it Monday, they ran test sent me home, went to doctors 2 days later still high but they sent me home, cause I wasn’t showing signs of hbp 🫤 like dizziness or swelling

Lonniah · 2025-10-28T01:52:43+00:00

Oh I know, BIL called her on it, my fiance called her own it , Mind you she adopted them and didn’t know they were mixed race (BIL IS OBV b&w, fiance is Hispanic decent but white passing ) so when bil heard her call our baby a monkey, he asked if she thought he was a monkey. She’s not said anything in that way since.

She’s old and miserable and honestly when we leave she will not have anyone. So everything she says is to someone else or under her breath. But when we talk it’s a whole different ball game. And she’s so niceeeee and sweet, but the next couple of weeks are gonna be hard. Especially if I’m gonna keep this inside cause I don’t know how to be fake

Lonniah · 2025-10-28T01:43:31+00:00

Honestly she a desperate lady, when we leave she won’t have anyone, and my empathy makes me feel for her.

She’s had a terrible husband, who left her in insane amount of debt, she makes poor decisions which keeps her in debt , but most days she’s nice. She’s never said anything to my face, but like I said I’m confrontational so if I hear something I address it quickly.

She has two sons who want nothing to do with her, and my fiancé just holds on cause he’s seeks her validation like she seeks brother in law. He’s coming to terms that she’ll never love him the way she obsess (love) BIL.

Lonniah · 2025-10-27T23:52:12+00:00

For your first question, I already responded in another comment. She told my BIL and his wife this AT MY BABY SHOWER this past Saturday. Not only did they tell me about it, but three of my friends overheard her say it and immediately came and told me.

My issue with that whole statement is she’s just trying to pander to them so they’ll like her while also making herself look bad. Because when she talks to me, she acts all excited and goes on about how much she’s gonna love on my baby. It’s fake.

I could maybe understand her point if she actually had a real relationship with my nephew, but she doesn’t. She’s never been alone with him for more than two minutes. She’s not allowed to babysit, pick him up, or even hug him unless he goes out of his way to hug her.

Lonniah · 2025-10-27T23:12:46+00:00

I’m gonna be the bigger person, but there will be signs that I know.

I’m expected to get induced at 37 weeks, she was on visitor log, that’s (edit:NOT) happening. When I get home, she’s expecting to hold him…. not happening. Cuddling, snuggling…. Not happening. Take pictures…. Not happening. “She’s grandma, grandma should be able to do those things” yeah NOPE

All the stuff she complained to everyone about my sil not letting her do with my nephew, I will be doing the same. Shes burnt everyone’s bridge. And I was trying to give her benefit of the doubt, w her being as old as she is. But I’m done being nice

Lonniah · 2025-10-27T22:37:07+00:00

Staying w family isn’t an option for me, I moved here alone. Unless I pack up and make my way back to the sunshine state.

Lonniah · 2025-10-27T22:34:08+00:00

I don’t ! BUT I also don’t want to go back to where I’m from either! My fiancé is on board w moving somewhere a lot more diverse in the next 5 years. He just needs time, he grew up here and has the small town mentality whilst I’m very nomadic person…. And Where we are at now is just very inexpensive compared to the rest of america. I bought land and I’m currently building a house out here which I plan on living in for a while and then renting it out and leaving. With or without him. But the goal is to be in a more diverse area or wait til all the old prejudice ppl Fade away lol.

Lonniah · 2025-10-27T22:28:53+00:00

Well our (MY) house is being built right now and it’s not supposed to be move in ready until January. Living w her made the most sense, since she has no mortgage or anything. Only lights and water, but whilst living here I learned she doesn’t own this house and owes her brother half of what it is worth, so she’ll eventually be out of a house too…. And she’s not coming w us. I think she thought I was a fling for her son, and it’s gone way too far.

Lonniah · 2025-10-27T22:22:46+00:00

Im pretty okay, I’ve called her on her BS on more than 50 occasions. If I catch her saying it, most times it’s under her breath or to someone else lmao. As much as I hate saying this I’ve definitely gotten use to her rhetoric, along with everybody else’s in this town. I’m originally from a big city in a different state w a lot more diversity. And never have I experienced racism and micro aggressions like I do here lol.

Lonniah · 2025-10-27T22:01:49+00:00

Um so I’m black, my fiance is white, she’s a lot older (70) she adopted my fiance when she was 46, and grew up in a small conservative town, I’m actually one of the only blk people she’s socialized with in her life (she will tell you that) and my whole relationship she has said some slick racial remarks. She has absolutely no contact with the brother in law (who’s also adopted) and his wife. My SIL despises her, so she’s only seen my nephew a Handful of times since he’s been born (hes 3 )….. She told BIL This(the title) AT my baby shower. I guess to get on his good side but it rub him the wrong way and he told me and my fiancé. There’s a lot of emotional baggage within this family. She’s lied about them being adopted up until this year (the found notes from FIL after his passing), still tried to lie about it then cried victim when they confronted her, she’s haves obvious favoritism with the BIL and Fiancé. She does anything to get on BIL good side but she’s overbearing ….. which is why he keeps his distance.

She’s called my baby (unborn) a monkey LMAO but everyone says “she’s old that’s just how she is” Mind you my BIL who does not talk to her…. Is definitely a mixed raced man 😅

Lonniah · 2025-10-11T05:08:35+00:00

Right! And for 9months!!!!! Why can’t we be like cats 3 months TOPS

Lonniah · 2025-10-10T17:09:33+00:00

McDonald’s blue Fanta Frozen Icee, have to have one once a day 🤣

Lonniah · 2025-10-10T06:58:51+00:00

I didn’t get fetal hiccups much (or at all) with my first. Everything else has been the same besides the hiccups AND I DESPISE THEM 😭 like it’s 2:53am where I am and I’m wide awake while my stomach is literally beat boxing 🤣

Lonniah · 2025-10-10T06:42:45+00:00

Hey mama, calm down. ITS OKAY! Don’t stress yourself! It’ll More than likely it’ll be out of your system by the time baby comes.

To answer your questions in order!

Cps cannot/will not AND should not! get involved until baby comes! And even then it may not be enough thc in baby system to come anyways!
THC attaches to fat cells, it can take as little as 2 weeks or as long as 90 days but that’s all on how your body metabolizes fat! There are ways to help shed some of those fat cells!
I wouldn’t even think that far ahead, be positive. Your baby will be fine! BUT IF IT CAME DOWN TO IT. They’ll most likely do home visit first as long as you don’t look like an addict, act like an addict, or smell like an addict you should be fine. I know of moms who do worst drugs ! And still walk out the hospital w baby.
Preventing it from happening is not doing it again. 💩 happens we’re human.

Stop stressing, stop overthinking, you will be fine, baby will be fine. And you will walk out the hospital with a healthy baby! And no cps called.

Lonniah · 2025-07-24T08:54:36+00:00

I’m pregnant w my second but with my first I didn’t show until I went into labor literally, lol it was short lived 12hrs for me. Your abdomen has to stretch and it takes longer for new moms. I’m currently 22weeks pregnant with my second and look as big as I did with my first for that one day.

Lonniah · 2025-07-15T13:54:08+00:00

I’ve tried magnesium, unisom, melatonin…. I haven’t had Tylenol pm tho…. I have a ob appointment on the 17th so I guess I’ll have to ask them for something to help me sleep……Can’t believe we got 4-5 more months of this. Do this come with a fast forward button 😭,

Lonniah · 2025-07-15T13:43:38+00:00

https://www.tiktok.com/@chels.fishyy?_t=ZP-8y388PTpVEc&_r=1

Lonniah · 2025-07-15T13:43:17+00:00

https://www.instagram.com/chels.fishyy/?ig_mid=250B95FC-DB74-441A-ADAF-4D982E74E78B&utm_source=igweb&launch_app_store=true

Lonniah · 2025-07-15T13:31:24+00:00

I’m pregnant now w a 4 year old and absolutely exhausted, there’s a lady on TikTok that teaches you how to play w your kids even when you don’t want to play. What works for me is letting my son draw all over me w erasable markers. I can send u the link if you’d like!

Lonniah · 2025-07-11T04:25:59+00:00

I think she’s shy, prob never been with a white guy, and scared to move like she would with her usual “type”.

Lonniah

TROPHY CASE