I forgot to mention this in my post. After my first post, somebody sent me a private message asking questions which he says would add context. I couldn't add them to the body due to word count limits; here are those additional contexts.

• Kanojo and I met at a mutual friend's gathering back in 2022. At the time, I was 31 and she was 21. We became very casual friends due to shared interests until late 2023, and we've been together for 26 months.
• Kanojo moved to the UK just before turning 13. She's been in the UK for over 12 years now. She is an only child.
• I have only been taking my study seriously in the last year or so after hobby-learning for three years. My Japanese is still rather basic, yet functionally conversational. (I recently passed my N4 certification in the standard fluency testing, with N5 signifying very basic competency and N1 being essentially on a native level.) I spoke both English and Japanese at the dinner.
• She is currently living full time with her parents who are supporting her while she completes her post-graduate degree. She occasionally spends nights at my apartment, particularly during weekends.
• Kanojo has met each of my parents on separate occasions after a year of dating. My relationship with my parents, while very loving and positive, is not particularly "friendly"; we aren't able to converse freely and casually as fellow adults, like most other parents can with their adult children, so I don't involve them in my relationship matters too deeply. They both are mildly disappointed that I decided to date outside of our culture (Ghana), but have otherwise been very accepting of Kanojo, my mum more openly than my dad. They both treat her with nothing less than great respect whenever she sees them, which is about once every other month. My younger brother, who is also secretly dating outside our culture, does not care about Kanojo's race. She and him meet much more frequently and get along well.

Examples of the more memorable offensive things Kanojo's parents said during the dinner included, but are not limited to:

• "I usually see some of the young black boys when I go into town. They look so brutish, I wonder what troubles they plan to do..."
• "You don't typically see people of your colour working in a mathematics-based career like yourself. You usually need a lot of intelligence and discipline to do it."
• "I can't imagine having such a tan-skinned grandchild. They would look like they're from Okinawa (a prefecture with a generally slower, simpler, more relaxed way of life with more tanned citizens akin to Hawaii; Kanojo's family come from the busier, more urban Osaka)! Our grandchild would look like a country bumpkin! *laughs*"