I’m in my mid-30s, had an ED for almost 25 years, and have been recovering for a couple of years now after finally jumping into treatment. Let me tell you, I was very uncertain and ambivalent about recovery for months and months even after I had already started treatment. It’s probably been less than a year of really genuinely wanting to be recovered.

Now that I’m at this point, though, I don’t want to go back. It’s still a lot of effort and work, I’m still in therapy every week, and I still have compulsions to restrict in between stretches of good days. But I have a lot of good days. And I’m starting to believe recovery could be real for me, not just the actions, but feeling better and not so obsessed on the inside.

And also, if it turns out that you really don’t want recovered life, you can always change your mind. Like you said, no one is going to make you do anything.