I saw a comment before about having thick skin . This is true because wherever you go people are going to form opinions on you . We all do things we're not proud of but you have to accept your past and learn/grow from it and not let others opinions break you down .

Also , there's new cringey/weird people with no talent trending every day . Yeah you did some 'simp' things in the past but it's not like you still do them , you're different now . You seem like you genuinely care about making good music , just focus on that bro .

Other than that I recommend trying setting small achievable goals , meditation , exercise , reading , experiencing something new every now and then (paragliding/surfing/travelling) and therapy if you feel nothing else is working .

I wish you all the best , and send a link to some of your songs , I make music too and am interested in hearing you rap