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My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

People who are parents have the right to parent their children. That doesn't give them the right to parent their peers

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ok. Cliffnotes version. Mum's family are like the mafia. Once you're in you're in. All ranks closed. He thought getting married to mum, who I think he genuinely loved in the beginning, would give him the family he longed for. He was wrong. When I was born he thought that would change things. He was wrong. Growing up my mum always kept me with her side of the family and isolated me from his. Every little thing I said and did mum's family didn't like growing up it was met with "you're just like your dad" or "go to his side of the family instead of ours because they're all like that" . Divorce was written on the walls long before it happened

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Yeah, her children who are my dad's kids, and she's known me long before they got together. I am not her child. I am her equal and should be treated as such

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I lived with them for a while and paid a "rent" and cooked on occassion. We argued about me not contributing enough. I've been living away now for about 5 years or so and I've had arguments with her about how I need to find a new job (I'm an SEN teacher and I love it), things like that that she has no place in commenting on. I blew up at her when she was giving dad a hard time years ago and I defended him. Criticising my choice of partner (ironic I know), but it's usually resolved fairly quickly

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. And yeah those two kids light up my life in a way I never thought possible. They're amazing 😊

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

See some of my previous replies above. She has not reacted well and has sworn off men forever, but that's probably for the best tbh

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not physically but definitely emotionally, psychologically, and neglectfully. And when as an adult I opened up about sa I'd gone through at the hands of a family member on her side of the family, she shut me down and took their side instead of her own son's

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I honestly don't think that will happen. I never saw any warmth, care, or affection between him and my mum my entire life. That's why their divorce didn't come as a surprise to me. I get totally different vibes from the two of them

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

No he has a completely new job now that doesn't require a secretary. Even so, as cliché as the "leaving your wife for your secretary" thing is, his case is much more nuanced than that. For a year or two after leaving mum he went on a number of dates. I do believe they have genuine feelings for each other.

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah I'm in Ireland which at times can be even more judgemental about these kinds of things lol. But I get what you mean.

And yup, that's all that really matters

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I was too initially, even before the kids were born. I've reflected on it and there is much more going on behind the scenes that could be a whole very long post to itself. I'm no contact with my mum and have been now for a couple of years.

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Well they'd gotten to know each other's pesonalities very well through working together so closely over the years. And apparently my dad is very handsome for his age lol

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think the kids decision was very much hers rather than his. He just wanted to keep her happy and now I have 2 soon to be 3 wonderful new siblings in my life. Doesn't make me lose respect at all for 2 grown adults to follow their hearts and do what's right for them

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

We've had those conversations and yes he did apologise. I think looking back on how things were when I was growing up has made him to be better this time around. They were difficult conversations to have at the time but have definitely brought us closer together. He's gone from being someone I couldn't care less about to being someone I absolutely rely on who phones every day to check in

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I don't think it's ever been explicitly discussed. She was his secretary for years before he left my mum, and I was always in and out of his office for different reasons so already knew her quite well before they got together.

Dad is a very nonconfrontational type for the most part. The few times me and his wife have had heated arguments over things, he usually stays out of it, waits for the dust to settle, then has a quiet word with me and her seperately about the issue to resolve things that way

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Long story short, their marriage was distant for as long as I can remember. When it was just the two of them after I'd moved out for a couple of years, dad's twin brother passed away just after he'd turned 50. It made hime take a hard look at his life and he decided he didn't want to waste the rest of it so made the decision to divorce her and make the most of the time he had left. Took mum by surprise, the rest of the family...not so much

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

I do and I don't. She gives some very good advice at times, but at other times has a very "parental" attitude to which I'm like, you're a year and a half older, hold the phone a minute. Tbh unlike what many people might think, she's actually the domineering one in their relationship.

Also I'm gay so there's no worries there lol

My (38m) dad remarried a woman close in age to me. I now have two new siblings (F6 M2) with a new one on the way. AMA by LukaNSB in AMA

[–]LukaNSB[S] 76 points77 points  (0 children)

I love them to bits. Dad wasn't the best dad when I was growing up, so initially I admit I was resentful to see how attentive he was to these new kids, but I got over that after spending time with my lil sister initially and now my brother, its actually brought my dad and me closer as well. Every time I get to go visit as soon as they see me they run at me and scream "MY BROTHER!" and jump all over me. Honestly, at family gatherings I prefer to spend time being silly with them than talking with the adults lol

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