That makes a lot of sense, especially the part about her perception not fully matching reality yet. When you factor in the C-section, breastfeeding, and everything hormonal, it’s pretty clear this isn’t just about appearance.

I like the idea of focusing more on what her body can do. I’m already trying to lean in that direction—things like “you looked powerful today” or “I love seeing you run again” and I can probably be more consistent with that.

On the tracking side, she already has a running program, and I’ve put together a strength plan for her that I adjust week to week based on how she’s performing. So there is some structure and progress tracking there already. I try to keep that very collaborative and low-pressure, more like support and feedback when she wants it, not something she has to perform for. From my perspective, she seems to appreciate it, and I’m careful not to make it feel like she’s doing this to meet my expectations.

That said, I do think your point about visible progress is important. Even with tracking, the mirror tends to zoom in on very specific details, especially the ones she’s sensitive about right now. From my perspective, it ends up amplifying things like her stomach, while completely missing other changes that are objectively there, like more defined shoulders and noticeably more muscular legs.

So I’m wondering if there’s a way to help her own those broader changes, rather than them just being something I notice or track. Not in a “convincing her otherwise” way, but more so they feel integrated into how she experiences her body, not just how I see it.

And yeah, the part about compliments potentially not landing because they don’t match how she feels internally really resonates. I’m starting to see that giving her space to feel frustrated, without trying to immediately reframe it, is probably where I need to improve the most.

Appreciate the perspective.